The malleable nature of online games means nothing is sacred, no aspect is safe from influence or enhancement. Even the recorded performance of an actor such as Peter Dinklage is a piece to be plugged into a game like Destiny - or unplugged, if someone better or with a more compatible schedule comes along.

Nolan North is taking over duties as the Ghost, your chatty companion orb in Destiny, after just one year. His role could be timeless, sure ... but nobody’s perfect. And as long as Destiny isn’t perfect, Bungie might as well put a revolving door on the Ghost’s recording booth.

Let’s cast for a spell, shall we?

“Xur, the odds of successfully surviving a moon wizard attack are approximately three thousand seven hundred and twenty to one!”

As the body, voice and soul of C-3PO, Anthony Daniels has some verified experience in playing a verbose, eternally consternated robot. There’s no shortage of horrid things to fret over in Destiny - The Vex, The Hive, that grumpy Mr. Crota - and no way to avoid countless firefights and spooky Martian caverns. He’s going to hate it, and his only R2 companion is the one that fires a loud gun.

As her stellar work in Orphan Black has shown, Canadian star Tatiana Maslany can blend into any role - an inhuman ball of talkative space minerals won’t even register as a challenge for her. You’ll totally forget it’s Maslany playing the Ghost, right until people start complaining about the fact that she hasn’t won an Emmy for it yet. Why hasn’t she won an Emmy yet? Seriously.

Troy Baker, or Nolan North 2, as he’s known among casting directors, should have little trouble compressing his considerable talents to fit inside the Ghost’s shell. He’d knock it out of the park, we know this, but there’s one other reason Troy Baker’s ubiquitous voice is an apt and inevitable part of Destiny: It’s a video game, and it’s illegal to release one without him.

Though 343 Guilty Spark has struggled to break out of menacing future-orb roles - does anyone remember his cameo as “Fancy Security Camera” on CSI: Cyber? - it might be time to fall back on what he’s best at. 343 Guilty Spark also has an in with Bungie, having worked with the studio on multiple Halo games and lore-heavy motion comics. There were some regrettable things said between parties after writers killed him off in Halo 3, of course, but he’s smoothed things over since then. Besides, if you really want to earn a grudge from Bungie,

“That pelvic sorcerer came from the moon!”

Chris Pratt is almost too cool for a video game, but Activision’s army of negotiators make a strong case when they all show up at once, in an actual case, in groupings of $10,000 or more. It’ll be money well spent to get a Ghost with all the qualities of Hollywood’s current go-to hero: inescapable charisma, a carefree embrace of adventure and some wild sex appeal.

Mmm, sexy, sexy Ghost man. Why don’t you place a nav beacon to my spaceship’s private quarters?

Forget the subservient AI routine - maybe we want the Ghost to be odd, unsettling, commanding, weird. Maybe we want Destiny’s main chatter to go through a Tilda Swinton filter, coming out in a skewed way, tingling in our ears like the demonic whispers of a dark universe throbbing just beneath our own. With every word, Tilda-bot shatters the bones of our conceptions, reducing our understanding of Destiny’s lore and our universe to a gently quivering blob. Now Destiny is an eldritch horror that we can never escape.

Shia LaBeouf does just fine as ol’ Ghosty, as we’ll come to call him around Destiny Year 4, but the important part is that he, well, did it. Standing in the mirror for a solid week, never once sitting or showering or eating, LaBeouf willed his dream into reality by shouting motivation phrases at himself. Do it. Do it. Become someone important! In Destiny, the video game!

We’ll look back fondly on this version of the Ghost, which proved that sometimes our aspirations can pay off, and that sometimes you just gotta kill Nolan North with your bare hands to get the gig. DO IT!

What’s he doing these days?

Think of how delightful Mrs. Potts was, and how adept Jessica Fletcher was at solving mysteries and corralling killers. That sounds like the kind of companion, eloquent yet inquisitive, you’d want alongside you in the fight against The Darkness. Lansbury’s considerable experience on film and stage makes her all the more fit for a Destiny Ghost - and there’s not a single grimoire card that says Jessica Fletcher wasn’t reincarnated as a whipsmart robo-sphere after she wrote all that murder. Bet you missed that aspect of the plot, didn’t you?

With the specter of George Lucas floating over every instance of a creator re-doing their work, fans will inevitably demand the return of the original Ghost from Destiny’s good ol’ days. “Dinklebot was better,” fans will say. “Perhaps we were too harsh on him,” critics will write. “Can you please kill Tyrion already and free up Dinklage’s schedule,” Bungie will whisper into George R.R. Martin’s ear. “And maybe it wasn’t entirely his fault.”

SSX for the Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 is only three-and-a-half years old, but let’s be honest: we haven’t had a proper, joyous SSX about bright color, big music, and even bigger air in over a decade. Starting with the original on PlayStation 2, EA Sports Big’s snowboarding game took the glutted extreme sports genre and revitalized it with a splash of wonderful absurdity. No real world snowboarder could pull of the aerial feats commonplace in SSX, let alone in the middle of a cloud of fireworks, but the series had an intense tangibility in its best moments. At its peak, nothing else felt like SSX and we miss it terribly.

We want you back, SSX. This is everything we loved about you that we want to see in you on modern day machines.