There are certain things you can expect to see in a new Mortal Kombat game. Yes, there will be extraordinarily gory Fatality finishers and flashy combos that can decimate your health bar. There will be copious amounts of blood and guts flying across the battlefield. But what really matters to players is the roster, with the hopes that it'll deliver a diverse cast of characters that afford many different playstyles.
Good news, then: offers tons of unique fighters, mixing old favorites with fresh faces and giving every character three distinct movesets called variations. If you want to see who made the kut in MKX, then click ahead for the full roster breakdown of everyone who's currently in the game, complete with high-res images.
No longer content with just killing pot-smoking, sexcapade-having teens, Jason Voorhees is bringing his iconic hockey mask and machete to the realm of MKX. He's not the only horror villain to make an appearance in the series (Freddy Krueger holds that honor in MK9), but Jason will be the first to have three variations, all aptly named: Slasher, Relentless, and Unstoppable. You can bet that at least one of his Fatalities will be a direct reference to his methods of onscreen slaughtering.
After having a real rough go of things in MK9, Kung Lao is back in MKX - though saying how might be a bit of a spoiler. All you really need to know is that yes, his hat still has a bladed brim, and yes, Kung Lao loves to throw at his opponents with impunity. He's one of the best rushdown characters out there, able to zoom in with a dive kick or teleport behind enemies who try to keep him at bay.
Gotcha! *Pow, pow, pow* Gotcha! *Pow, pow, pow* Gotcha! *Pow-pow-you get the idea. Fighting against Jax can be a really demoralizing experience as the man basically has a tool for every situation - from projectiles to that oh-so-catchy Gotcha! grab. There’s no escaping the guy. He can knock you down from the other end of the screen, and then propel himself forward and right into your personal space. After that, well, you know what comes next...
Much like her on-again, off-again husband, Johnny Cage, Sonya Blade has undergone quite the transformation in MKX. In addition to locating a tank top, she is a much more well-rounded and fully realized character than in any MK game prior. She’s also an ass-kicking mom who can summon attack drones to harass her opponents from all over the screen. By fighting in conjunction with her drones, there’s nowhere for the opponent to hide.
Take the blinded Neo from the end of The Matrix Revolutions and give him a samurai sword. That's pretty much Kenshi in a nutshell, the sightless telepath who can move things with his mind. Depending on which variation you select, Kenshi's able to send out harmful spirit projections, wield his sword like a telekinetic lightsaber, or summon a scythe-wielding demon for some devastating combos. He's also got some of the most sadistic Fatalities in the game, which really don't match his usual calm-and-collected demeanor.
The blue-clad Edenian princess is back, and she's royally pissed. Using her twin bladed fans, Kitana can slice and dice opponents from afar or up close, and she has dominant control of the air when played correctly. If you're disappointed that Jade isn't back for MKX, don't worry - Kitana's Mournful variations is an homage to her green-clad compatriot, complete with all of Jade's classic staff-wielding, boomerang-chucking moves. The Assassin variation gives Kitana an equally interesting new tactic: the ability to parry attacks.
Scorpion is still a beast in MKX, without being the overwhelming juggernaut he was in the previous Mortal Kombat. Teleporting? Check. Lighting people on fire? Check. Get over here? Double check. All the classic moves are there, but they’re split up between the three variations available to each character. This means it’s a bit tougher to cheese your way through a fight using special moves alone. Trust us, we’ve tried.
Sub-Zero (aka Scrub-Zero, aka Is-that-Steve-Blum) is cruise control for cool when it comes to putting your opponent on ice. This frosty ninja’s arsenal of ice attacks will have the other player shaking in their boots. Using his expert ice sculpting skills, Sub-Zero can whip up a sword or an entire sculpture of himself in mere moments, before breaking those items upside someone’s head. Guess it’s time for them to… chill out.
Kitana's razor-toothed sister/clone/tormenter is a bit more toned down in MKX - which, if you remember her ridiculous bandages-only outfit from MK9, is definitely a good thing. Mileena finally has some lips to cover a few of those pointy mandibles, so it actually makes sense that she'd be able to speak intelligibly. As for her fighting style, her lightning-fast rolls and high-low sai projectiles can kill the opponent before they know what hit 'em.
Kenshi's wise-cracking son is one of four members of the secret Special Forces squad that's central to the story, showing off what this new generation of MK fighters is capable of. Takeda's style blends the Shirai Ryu training he learned from a certain yellow-clad master with arm-mounted whips, making him like the techno-ninja version of Omega Red. Oh, and just FYI: you have to be in the air to activate his X-Ray attack.
The de facto leader of the new-gen super-squad, Cassie is quite clearly the daughter of Johnny Cage and Sonya Blade, given both her attitude and fighting style. She's got all the military training and natural-born leadership inherent to her mother, mixed with the witty (and completely cheesy) one-liners and cockiness of her father. Cassie has even got her own version of Johnny's iconic groin punch, even yelling out "Ding! Dong!" when she drives home a one-two combo to the opponent's crotch.
The descendant of the great Kung Lao, Kung Jin rounds out Cassie's team with his Shaolin monk training and education in the ways of Outworld. He may be cocky, but Kung Jin has the skills to back up all his taunting, wielding a person-sized bow that also doubles as a bone-cracking staff. When he's not firing off arrows to the point that you look like a human pincushion, Kung Jin can get all up in your grill with his dive kick and leg-sweeping bow swings.
Ever since (spoilers) Shao Kahn got zapped by the Elder Gods at the end of MK9, Earthrealm has really been wanting for a megalomaniacal tyrant who could scheme to take it all over. Enter Shinnok, the fallen Elder God who's as sinister as he is pale. Shinnok serves as the main antagonist in MKX's story mode, and you'll get a closer look into how he's essentially the Emperor Palpatine of the Mortal Kombat universe.
Someone just needs to put old Kano out of his misery already. It’s literally all people talk about when they talk about Kano. “Hey guys,” someone will start, “Kano sure is a bad dude, we should totally kill him.” And EVERYONE will agree, but it never happens. Somehow this clown keeps rolling his way through one Mortal Kombat sequel after the next. That's ok, though, because his knife skills, laser eye beams, and physics-defying spin moves are always welcome.
Mortal Kombat veteran Johnny Cage makes a surprising transformation in MKX, from the wise-cracking stuntman of yore to a military commando and concerned father. Don’t get me wrong, he still has that signature Cage wit, but it has been tempered a bit with age. Like a fine wine, albeit one that can throw green fireballs and punch you in the junk. In the ring, Johnny’s simple-yet-aggressive fighting style makes him an ideal pick for new players; just make sure to yell “CAGED!!” after you win.
If you love Mortal Kombat but felt it was missing a Wild West aspect, MKX has the cure for what ails you. Erron Black is an Earthrealm cowboy turned Outworld mercenary, signing up to be part of Kotal Kahn's hit squad. Though he typically relies on his twin revolvers, he can also specialize with a long-range rifle or a devastating sword by way of his variations. He also has some of the most ridiculous combos and unyielding corner pressure you've ever seen, so there's really no safe distance to fight against this gunman.
The king of the high-pitched battle cry, Liu Kang is a fireball-chucking, bicycle-kicking machine. For those who like long, flowing combos straight out of a kung fu choreography montage, then Liu Kang's ample attack strings will be your cup of tea. But he's just as effective at the keep-away game, able to spit out high and low dragon-shaped fireballs until your opponent is simply exasperated. Just don't blame us when they want to beat you down in real life after the match.
Ermac is many, you are but one. You wouldn’t think fighting-by-committee would be very efficient, but the enigmatic Ermac makes it work. With an army of souls comprising his entire being, Ermac excels at lifting opponents into the air and doing horrible things to them. He’s basically putting on a little puppet show, and you’re the star attraction. Definitely a good pick if you just want to humiliate the other player.
Kotal Kahn may be the new emperor of Outworld, but he’s no Shao Kahn. Poor Kotal can barely keep his subordinates in line on a good day. On a bad day, someone makes a play on Kotal’s life, and the big guy has a lot of bad days. Shao Kahn wouldn’t put up with this nonsense. He had a hammer. Kotal has the power of the sun and a grappler/brawler fighting style that’s very technical. If you don’t like micromanaging various stat buffs during a fight, give Kotal a pass.
This scaly ninja is now part of Kotal Kahn's gang, spitting acid and slicing flesh to keep Outworld's riff-raff in check. He's also one of the trickiest fighters in the MKX roster, both to play as and to fight. All three of his variations offer traits that make life difficult for your opponent, be it a constant damaging aura, the ability to go completely invisible, or the power to slow down time in a manner similar to The Flash in Injustice.
Ferra and Torr seems like the only two people in the entire Mortal Kombat universe who are having any fun. Maybe Johnny Cage is too, but his ironic detachment makes it hard to tell. This gruesome twosome seem to genuinely enjoy the act of fighting and living in a universe governed by martial arts contests. I guess that’s the magic of friendship. Anyone who will join you to stand up against immortal thunder gods and dead wizards is a friend indeed.
Kotal Kahn's right-hand insect-woman is as deadly as she is creepy. When she's not lashing out with the humongous pincers that spring out of her back, D'Vorah likes to spray bug juices from her wrist-mounted maggot friend or release a swarm of god-knows-what from her chest cavity. And if you look closely, you'll see that her peepers are textured like a bee's compound eyes. For those who like to get underneath their opponent's skin as well as up in their face during combat, D'Vorah's the right pick.
Most people think Raiden is the god of thunder, but in actuality he’s the god of making the most out of a bad situation. Life just doesn’t let up on the poor guy. First it was some vague prophecy from the future, then a bunch of his friends died, and now some guy that looks like Emperor Palpatine is plotting world domination. It just never ends. But Raiden doesn't complain. Instead, he makes those really silly kung-fu noises while torpedoing someone across the screen.
When you’re playing Quan Chi, you’re thinking with portals. His whole fighting style is based on messing with the other player’s head, making him one of the most enjoyable combatants to take into the ring. One minute you’re hypnotizing the other player and making them act like a zombie, the next you’re summoning a hellbat to rain death from above. And the portals! Quan Chi is constantly sticking his hands, swords, and other players into portals and tossing them all over the screen. He may be evil, but you can’t go wrong with this tricksy necromancer.
'Press X to Goro' has become something of a minor meme among MKX players, since this hulking, four-armed Shokan warrior constantly stares at you from the character select screen, as if insisting that you buy him as DLC if you don't already have him as a pre-order reward. But for those who prefer the 'brute force' approach, Goro can really bring the pain with his flurry of punches and screen-crossing leap attack. And that Fatality where he tears off all your limbs at once is just brutal.
Whenever a movie like releases, giving me the chance to watch a bunch of superheroes using their super powers to beat the crap out of bad guys, my imagination gets away from me and I get hyped. I want to get in the action, too. Forget this spectating thing, let me get in there and kick some ass myself. I mean, there probably won't be an army of actual robots attacking the earth soon, and I don't actually have superpowers, but all that action makes me want to jump into a superhero role.
Whether you'd like to wade into battle with Captain America's shield, have the acrobatic ability of Black Widow, or smash everything like the Hulk, it's possible to step into your favorite hero's shoes. But rather than expose yourself to gamma radiation or invent an invincible suit of armor, you can just play video games. The Avengers have shown up in plenty of games, allowing you to play the part of the hero. Want to become your favorite superhero? Well, I've gathered together some of the best representations of each Avengers: Age of Ultron hero in games, right here.
Captain America is the greatest soldier that ever lived. He's got the conscience of a saint, and the strength and skill to take on just about any supervillain you could throw at him. If you really want to get the feeling of what it's like to be Cap from the movies, Captain America: Super Soldier is where it's at.
In Super Soldier, you play out Cap's World War II days as he battles Red Skull and his army of technologically advanced super soldiers. I'm not going to lie, Super Soldier isn't the most polished comic book-based superhero game you'll ever play. However, it does have a strong Batman Arkham series-style combat system at work that makes battling Hydra goons a blast.
If playing the star spangled Captain isn't your jam, there's always the Avengers’ most popular member. Yes, Iron Man has had his own movie tie-in games and he has been in a few side-scrolling beat 'em ups, but none of those games make the billionaire, playboy, philanthropist timidating or fun to play than in the Marvel vs Capcom series. Tony Stark is all about the glitz and the glam, and what better way to embrace that part of the character than in a flashy, fan service-flooded fighting game.
Even if Tony Stark seems to be wearing a bulky, inflexible, robot suit, he's just as quick with face busting punches and kicks as the next super-powered fighter. Iron Man uses a ton of his signature gadgets and attacks in his moveset, from his uni-beam chest blast to shoulder missiles, but the most memorable one is definitely his Hyper move. When activated, Iron Man pulls out a massive proton cannon that fires an energy beam that covers half the screen.
If you want to be a real beefcake superhero, you want to play as Thor. The god of thunder is right up there with the most powerful heroes to ever sign up for the Avengers team. He has a hammer that only he can pick up, the power of lightning at his fingertips, and strength to rival the Hulk. But as with Iron Man, Thor's console movie tie-ins haven't been the most well received. Surprisingly, you can get the most satisfying thunder god action on the Nintendo DS.
Thor: God of Thunder on the DS is a movie tie-in game based on the Marvel movie universe, but it takes place before the events of the first Thor movie. It's a simple brawler with a thoroughly entertaining combat system, memorable boss encounters, and some pretty impressive characters and environment art. The game is a little bit retro and totally kick ass - not unlike Thor himself.
When you want to play a game as the indestructible, incredible Hulk, really all you want to do is jump over buildings and smash everything in sight. After all, "Hulk smash," is what the big green guy does. The Incredible Hulk: Ultimate Destruction lets you do that, and it's the best thing ever.
Ultimate Destruction is an open-world game that gives you free reign to explore and demolish an entire city. You can leap over tall buildings, throw cars into attacking helicopters, and weaponize ripped appart vehicles as you fight off Hulk Buster robots and the military's tanks. No other Hulk game makes you feel like a gamma ray-powered monster like Ultimate Destruction does. Even though the game came out two console generations ago, this title is still the best Hulk experience you're going to get.
Thanks to Scarlett Johansson's version of Black Widow in the Marvel movies, the Russian spy has become one of the more popular Marvel superheroes. Now we just need a game that stars the Avengers’ most dangerous secret agent. But that hasn't happened yet, and to this day Black Widow has only been a side-character or included on massive rosters like that of the Lego Marvel Super Heroes and Marvel Ultimate Alliance games.
If you want to jump in on the action as Black Widow, Lego Marvel Super Heroes does the character justice. The Lego titles give plenty of attention to every character on the hero rosters, and Black Widow is no different. In Lego Marvel Super Heroes, you have all of the neck snapping, acrobatic combat moves, high-tech gadgets, and weapons you see Black Widow use in the movies.
Like Black Widow, Hawkeye hasn't shown up in games as much more than a support or side character. Poor Hawk Guy doesn't always get all of the respect that he deserves. With his pinpoint accuracy, arsenal of you-name-it arrowheads, and quippy personality, it's a wonder why he hasn't had his own game yet. But, if you want to play as Hawkeye, you'll want to check out Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2.
Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2 not only lets you play as Hawkeye, you can level him up to earn skills that allow you to fire electrified, ice, and armor piercing arrows. Plus, there are four costume types to choose from. So, you can dress in outfit ranging from the classic purple costume, to the Ultimates look (which is very close to the movie costume).
If you have the hankering to fight supervillains as the entire team of Avengers, the Marvel Ultimate Alliance series is what you're looking for. You can assemble a group of superheroes from a roster of dozens of upgradeable Marvel characters with alternate costumes - including just about every character mentioned in this article. You even get an attribute bonus if your group consists of all Avenger members.
There are also classic side-scrolling brawlers such as Captain America and the Avengers which is one of the few chances you can actually choose to play as the Vision - a newly-added character in the Marvel movie universe. That's all I have for you this time true believers. Were there any other outstanding Avengers games I missed? Let me know in the comments below.
Royal sons in games have much more variety in their lives than in the real world, where they just sell corned beef and pies in tins. Grocery joke for you there. We’ve seen princes puffed up with noble quests, ousted princes fighting for their birthright, orphans unaware that they’re even princes – even digital doppelgangers of Buckingham Palace bluebloods (as in 8-bit butler sim Flunky). On the whole they have it better than gaming’s princesses, who rarely get to do more than sigh, shrug and be kidnapped. Let’s seek an audience with some of the good eggs and bad lads of royal bearing…
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Probably the best-known RPG hero prince (apologies to FFIV’s spoony bard Edward). Marth of Altea has slain dark dragons in his native Fire Emblem and tussled with angels, Pokémon and the Hero of Time in Smash Bros.
FromSoftware’s first-person PSX series was full of royals on rock-hard quests, such as castaway prince Alex seeking the Moonlight Sword on the grim island of Melanat. He returned in the next game… dead, and haunting a fountain. Nice.
World-class lunatic who made for several great boss battles. Trapped, up to his knees in his own dead guards with arrows sticking out of his back, vengeful Highland Prince Luca kept on coming like a medieval T-800.
The smaller the Prince, the bigger the responsibility. This perky gent was forever rolling new celestial bodies after the King (a deranged cosmic liability) wrecked the old ones. Monarchy: it’s not all glamorous.
He stands at the Tower Of The Moon, looking Southeast to the Downs Of Shadows. Luxor and pals led the charge against the armies of Doomdark, 30 years ago. 30!
Ultra-rich alien, Black Sun crime lord and overall bad bugger. Planned to usurp Darth Vader, kill Luke and cop off with Leia using his creepy pheromone powers until Dash Rendar and pals blew up his palace as a gentle warning.
It's been an emotional time for Silent Hill fans. This roller coaster of disappointments kicks off with developer Konami confirming . The playable teaser at first seemed destined for an early grave, only to defy all expectations and continue haunting the PS4 - though, for how long, is anyone's guess. Hopefully none of you dropped any fat stacks on a P.T.-installed PlayStation over on eBay.
Between the loss of Silent Hills and the turbulence surrounding P.T., there is definitely a pyramid-shaped hole in all our hearts. That's why I've compiled this list of the best Silent Hill fan-games developed by the community, as a way to help us all cope with our continued need to freak ourselves right-the-flip out. The next new Silent Hill game feels further away now than ever, but perhaps these entries will help the horror hit closer to home.
By all accounts, Alchemilla General Hospital is a top-notch medical facility, provided you don't mind the bloody handwriting on the walls or the twisted faces of its caretakers. Running on Source SDK 2013, which you can find under tools in your Steam Library, , Alchemilla isn't a "remake of any game from the Silent Hill series, [but] a completely original story with its own secrets to solve."
True to its namesake, Alchemilla Hospital is the real star of the show. Within its decrepit labyrinth of hallways, players will encounter all the blood, rust, and uncomfortably sexy nurses they've come to expect from Silent Hill. The game is also played entirely in first-person, devoid of combat but with a heavy emphasis on puzzle solving, not unlike a certain playable teaser. Make sure you have a pen and paper handy before jumping into this one.
If you and three friends have a long weekend to kill, consider slumming it in scenic Silent Hill. This 11-map-mega-marathon transforms Left 4 Dead into a highlight reel of Silent Hill's best. And make no mistake, it's a beast to finish - especially if you want to see all four endings (including a UFO ending). Seeing the fog-choked streets of Silent Hill flooded with zombies doesn't exactly gel with the series' tone, but there are genuinely cool moments to be had such as seeing your first zombie horde charge out of the endless mist.
This mod comes by way of developer , who has also authored another Silent Hill collection for Left 4 Dead 2 titled Otherside of Life, which is more of an homage to Silent Hill. It draws visual inspiration from that sleepy town, but is very much its own adventure. Leafo is currently working on porting his original Silent Hill mod from Left 4 Dead to Left 4 Dead 2, promising "minor changes to more than the aesthetic part of the campaign."
As if there wasn't already enough weird stuff happening in Fallout: New Vegas, someone had to throw Silent Hill into the mix. As the story goes - and there's a fair amount of story to be found here - the "great war" that devastated Fallout's world led to Silent Hill being "sealed away" underground. Naturally, the Enclave decided to do a little spelunking in this haunted town and suffered the consequences. And once you track the mysterious White Noise radio station to their dig site, you may end up meeting the same fate.
Fair warning: playing this mod takes patience. You get one quest early on stating "Enjoy your eternal stay in Silent Hill" and no quest markers. And because the quest starts with you being captured by the Enclave, all your fancy items and equipment get shelved for this outing. Hope you dropped some points in unarmed combat, because melee weapons are your lifeline in this ammo-scarce suburb, not unlike the real Silent Hill. Some extra ranks in sneaking will also save your life when you have to hide from a certain pyramid-headed horror.
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finally answers the question: what would Silent Hill 2 be like if it took place on a sunny afternoon? The bright, colorful trappings inherent to Minecraft make this mod feel like more of a parody than a tribute. Instead of cautiously exploring fog-drenched alleyways and side streets, your avatar jauntily jogs down the road on a cloudless day. I'm shocked there aren't birds singing in the distance.
To be fair, there is a lot of creative effort on display in this mod. A Letter from Silent Heaven isn't just some Silent Hill-themed texture pack, it's a meticulous recreation of Silent Hill 2. There's no mining or crafting to speak of, just a dedicated survival adventure. "Countless hours of watching/recording in-game footage, navigating through level editors and texture viewers brought you this custom adventure map," notes author Vladimyr on the Minecraft forums. And it shows, right down to the look of the health drinks and the cries of the monsters. It's certainly a reconstruction unlike anything the series has seen before.
You wouldn't think the dark, violent world of Silent Hill would translate very well to Little Big Planet's cute, cuddly toy box, but leave it to the gaming community to make it happen. There are actually dozens upon dozens of fan-made Silent Hill-themed creations spanning the Little Big Planet series, far too many to parse through here. Some are nothing more than escape from a spooky hospital or run around in the fog, their only connection to Silent Hill a welcome sign or the iconic Halo of the Sun symbol.
Then there are ones that really go the extra mile, such as user MonkeyButler's stelar Silent Hill tribute for the original Little Big Planet. This 2D interpretation of the first Silent Hill is a sort of highlights reel from the game's opening hours, starting with your first visit to the other world through Midwich Elementary (and beyond). You can watch a very distressed Sackboy run through it .
Before making a name for himself with the 2D survival horror game Lone Survivor, developer Jasper Byrne created this NES-style remake of Silent Hill 2. Released as part of TIGSource's demakes competition in 2008, is quite possibly the most adorable remake ever designed. The large heads and tiny bodies of its characters give the (limited) cast a sort of Charlie Brown-aesthetic, as if this were all just a really disturbing cartoon special.
As someone who enjoyed Lone Survivor, it's interesting to return to this game and spot the similarities. The 2D perspective, the look of the world, the way combat is handled: Soundless Mountain is just as much a trial run as it is a tribute. And unlike the other entries on this list, Soundless Mountain II isn't a mod for an existing game. It's a free standalone, which you can download from the developer's site. Too bad it was never finished, as the game abruptly ends once you reach the equivalent of Wood Side Apartments. A pixelated cutout of Pyramid Head in the credits teases what could have been.
In keeping with the spirit of Silent Hill, I thought I'd end this feature with a weird one. It should come as no surprise that someone out there got the rights to produce . By the looks of it, these are just your typical poker cards, but with spooky pictures of Silent Hill characters on them - specifically from 2008's Silent Hill: Homecoming. What is surprising is that a man named Don Riddle decided to create a fan-game using these cards called Silent Hill: Defeated that's sort of like a rust-colored, monster-filled version of Uno.
Looking over , it actually doesn't sound half bad. Up to three players are dealt a hand of cards, with the black suits representing monsters and the red suits representing heroes (and their weapons). Players then take turns playing different combinations of cards on top of each other to defeat whatever the last person put down (again, sort of like Uno). The first player to run out of cards frees themselves from Silent Hill's clutches and escapes. Just make sure you don't shoot Cybil on the merry-go-round, otherwise you'll get the bad ending.
In my opinion, these are the Silent Hill fan-games that top the charts, though they are not the only fan-games out there. Amnesia Hill almost made the cut, though its haunted house-vibe and tenuous connections to the source material ultimately held it back. There are also about a million "atmosphere mods" for Resident Evil 4 if you really want to play that with 100% more fog. My question to you is: are there any goods ones out there I missed? Personally, I hope there are, and if you know one be sure to drop it in the comments below.
Even the most virtuous saint can have a sinister streak. The important part is whether or not you actually act on those dark impulses. That's one of the things that make video games so interesting - you can have fun exploring your meaner instincts without worrying about hurting anyone, going to jail, or destroying anything important. But just because you're in a safe, digital environment, doesn't mean that there aren't any consequences to your actions.
Even when games give you carte blanche to run wild and destroy everything, there's still a good chance that the developers have snuck in some kind of morality to, erm, 'nudge' you in the right direction. Whether that means sending an army after your to punish you for your transgressions or just killing you outright, these games make a point to teach you a lesson for your evil, evil ways.
This is classic video game punishment that still has the power to mentally scar anyone who dares attempt it. Attacking those innocent, feathery Cuccos that appear throughout Hyrule will cause them to swarm after you in a frenzied rage, and the only way to get them to stop is to leave the current area. It's a staple of the series, appearing in games like A Link to the Past, Ocarina of Time, and even spin-offs like Hyrule Warriors. Luckily, one or two hits won't set them off - you have to be incredibly deliberate in your quest to draw their ire.
Samus Aran may not talk a lot, but she's generally considered a good, kind-hearted person, always showing up to save the day when duty (or a few dollars) calls. But Metroid Prime 3 lets you take a few potshots at one of its few NPCs milling about near the beginning. You can't actually hurt them, but if you keep it up, a little turret drops down to defend them from your senseless aggression. Blow that turret up, and another, stronger one drops down to replace it. Destroy that one, and an even bigger turret shows up, and .
Conversely, Richard Riddick is not a good guy - hence why he's locked up in the hardest maximum security prison in the galaxy in the first place. In fact, Escape from Butcher Bay is perfectly OK with you killing off other inmates, as long as the guards don't catch you in the act. Well, that's the case in the first two sections of the prison. Once you make it to the super ultra maximum security area, any attempt to murder your fellow inmates will result in an immediate "death sentence" flag by the computer, and poison will instantly start to course through your veins, thanks to the cryogenic suit you're forced to wear. Human rights? Not so important in the far reaches of the galaxy, apparently.
Shadow Warrior takes the "retribution against animal cruelty" to a whole new level. Most of the creatures you can eviscerate in the 2013 reboot deserve it, as the only thing that doesn't want to kill you outright are some bunnies you'll see milling about and… *ahem* getting amorous with each other. Try to interrupt their lovemaking by shooting them, however, and suddenly these innocent rabbits start hunting you down with lightning-quick speed while heavy metal blares in the background. Lesson learned.
No one likes a team killer, but Conker's Bad Fur Day's will actually call you out on your indiscretions. Take out too many of your own teammates, and you'll be branded a traitor. Soon, you'll find that there's nowhere to hide, as your AI compatriots will hunt you down until someone finally kills you. The final insult comes as they shout things like "Fucking traitor!" as they pump you full of lead.
The Badi Dea (say it fast) is a Star Destroyer that originally showed up in the classic space-sim X-Wing. The name is a hint; you're supposed to run away from this behemoth as fast as you possibly can, before it and its endless waves of fighters shred your ship to bits. But in the semi-sequel TIE Fighter, the Badi Dea is one of your allies - unless you decide to take out one of the ships you're supposed to be protecting. Apparently, the Empire considers this to be treason (with good reason), and sends the Badi Dea after you. It won't stop until you've been pounded into so much space dust.
Many games don't like it when you attack animals with wanton cruelty, but Metal Gear Solid 2 is one of the few to actually try to make you feel really guilty about it. Once you first climb out of the depths of the Big Shell and into the sunlight, you'll notice that the sky is filled with seagulls - who are more than willing to take a crap on you if you stand in one place for too long. If you spend too much time getting revenge by shooting them out of the sky, you'll get a call from the Colonel and your girlfriend Rose, asking you, in so many words, "What the hell do you think you're doing?" You can't even save your game until you apologize to Rose. You know what you did.
Half of the fun of those old King's Quest games was trying to outsmart the text parser by typing in random stuff and seeing if the game would do something with it. In some situations, it actually would - usually with hilarious results. If you walk into the church in King's Quest 2 and , the game actually throws up its hands in disgust. "Anyone who would kill a man of the cloth doesn't deserve to play this game. Therefore, we will end it," the game reads, promptly killing you dead on the spot. A simple "no" would have sufficed.
If you're reading this, it may already be too late. As of April 29th, 2015, P.T. - the playable teaser for the - will be gone from PSN, presumably forever. This tragic loss (especially for those who have never, and now may never, play it) exemplifies the most terrifying drawback of the digital distribution methods we've grown to love. When a downloadable game gets delisted, it effectively ceases to exist for anyone who doesn't already own it.
But P.T. isn't the only great game to be struck down by a delisting. PlayStation Network, Xbox Live Arcade, eShop, and Steam have all discarded their fair share of games, typically because of red tape like unrenewed licensing agreements. And while some of those exiled titles are no great loss, the following delistings may throw you into a state of deep despair upon realizing all the games you could have been enjoying if only you had acted sooner. If you bought these when they were available and still have 'em saved to a hard drive somewhere, thank your lucky stars. If you don't, then things are about to get very emotional.
Now nowhere to be found on: XBLA, PSN
I'll kick things off with the one I hate myself for missing the most. Scott Pilgrim is a comic-turned-film that's heavily inspired by retro gaming culture, and The Game channeled all that nostalgic energy into a four-player beat-'em-up with a sublime 16-bit style. The audio-visual department was every geek's dream, with an art team lead by the stupidly talented and a delightfully blippy soundtrack from renowned chiptune band Anamanaguchi. I've realized too late that I'd quite like to take the fight to Ramona Flowers' seven evil exes, but it seems Ubisoft wasn't too keen on renewing this license at the end of 2014. That pretty much leaves 'moaning in powerless agony' as my only remaining option.
Now nowhere to be found on: XBLA, PSN
A few years after comics giant Marvel was acquired by Disney, there was a sort of great purge for online storefront items related to its iconic superheroes. Notable losses include Deadpool and X-Men Origins: Wolverine, but the delistings that hit the hardest for fighting game fans were Marvel vs. Capcom Origins, Marvel vs. Capcom 2, and all the brilliant DLC for Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3. The former two games (three, if you factor in that Marvel Super Heroes was bundled into Origins) still exist in increasingly rare disc form, but MvC3 characters Jill Valentine and Shuma-Gorath have completely faded into the aether of lost DLC, along with all the downloadable costumes that really packed in the fan-pleasing references. By choosing not to renew its fighting game licenses with Capcom, Disney took me for a ride, alright... a ride into utter sadness.
Now nowhere to be found on: XBLA
This was less of an actual downloadable game and more of a fun social experiment. Based on the game show of the same name, 1 vs. 100 is the ultimate in unfair odds, where a lone player (given the Neo-esque title of 'The One') must answer trivia questions correctly in the face of 100 people who desperately want to see The One get it wrong. The main attraction was the Live Show mode, complete with an on-air host (with their own Xbox Avatar) doing color commentary, as well as interviews with folks like Major Nelson and prizes that were worth actual money. After two 13-week 'seasons', Microsoft called it quits, and 1 vs. 100 became forever lost to time. For many gamers, it'll probably be the closest they'll ever come to taking part in a bona fide game show. But hey, there's always the abysmal DS version (hosted by none other than Bob Saget).
Now nowhere to be found on: Steam
In case you didn't know, Outrun 2006 is among the , it's pretty damn difficult to argue. For a while, Sega's sunny convertible racer was available for download on Steam, with the kind of crisp textures that the PS2 and Xbox versions could only dream of. Alas, Sega's lapsed Ferrari license prevents any future downloads of Outrun 2006 (or its sequel, Outrun Online Arcade). The game's still out there, but these days, asking someone to buy a physical disc for an old PC game is like telling a millennial who can't find a movie on Netflix to just borrow the DVD from their local library. Yes, they could do that, but will they? Probably not.
Now nowhere to be found on: XBLA, PSN
Back in the '90s, Konami brought the ruckus when it came to quarter-munching arcade beat-'em'-ups. Whether you were playing alone or in a dedicated co-op party of four, bopping bad guys in X-Men, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and The Simpsons Arcade Game was nothing short of glorious. All three of these classic tie-in brawlers eventually made a comeback with downloadable ports - and all three have now been banished to the void of expired licenses, never to be renewed. If you had the foresight to snatch these up when they were available, please invite me over some time so I can relive all those happy arcade memories. I'll bring pizza!
Now nowhere to be found on: 3DS eShop
I warn you, this delisting is just inexplicably mean, and may cause The Legend of Zelda fans who missed out to weep the bitterest of tears. Nintendo had good intentions on this road to hell, deciding to celebrate the Zelda series' 25th anniversary with a free gift. An amazing one, at that: a DSiWare port of Four Swords, the four-player co-op adventure full of inventive puzzles and friendly griefing among the color-coded quartet of Links. Best of all, the local multiplayer is wireless, without any pricey link cables necessary. The Anniversary Edition was available at no charge from September 2011 to February 2012, then again during the first month of 2014 - but if you didn't download it during those timeframes, it's now completely unobtainable. Does Nintendo not realize how many people would happily pay money for this port, if only it would let them?
Now nowhere to be found on: XBLA, PSN
It's all about the timing with this particularly unfortunate delisting. After Burner Climax is in the same boat as Outrun 2006: a SegaAM2 arcade classic given a faithful reboot in three lush dimensions. Amazingly, Climax retains the same blazing mach speeds of its predecessors, as you gun down legions of enemy bogeys from your sleek jet fighter. To avoid renewing licenses with real-world aircraft companies, Sega announced in December 2014 that it would be pulling Climax from online storefronts on Christmas Eve, of all days. Then, in a shocking twist, the game suddenly disappeared a week ahead of schedule, with no explanation given. For those prospective buyers who thought they would have more time, it was like the horrifying inverse of an early Christmas present from Sega.
Now nowhere to be found on: XBLA
This one holds a special place in my heart for being the first XBLA game I ever downloaded. All you have to do in this simple 3D platformer is guide a marble to a goal as fast as possible, utilizing power-ups and momentum-accelerating trickery to cut corners and improve your time. It's just as devilishly addictive as Super Monkey Ball, but with larger, more forgiving levels and 100% fewer simians. In a cruel twist of fate, developer GarageGames retains the rights to the Marble Blast engine but not the games themselves, so Ultra got ejected in 2011. The good news is, a PC port is (somehow) . The bad news is that all those stunningly impressive leaderboard replays of the best times (and some oh-so-satisfying Achievements) are gone forever.
Now nowhere to be found on: 3DS eShop
A generation of gamers will always associate handheld gaming with Tetris for the original Game Boy, since it came bundled in with Nintendo's landmark portable system. Those 8-bit visuals have the power to practically transport you back in time, so nostalgia surely played a part in Tetris' popularity on the 3DS Virtual Console market. But all that reminiscing came to a screeching halt when Ubisoft acquired the legendary puzzle license to make Tetris Ultimate, putting the kibosh on eShops sales of Tetris Axis and Tetris for Game Boy in the process. Boo, I say.
Now nowhere to be found on: XBLA, PSN
There've been plenty of casualties when it comes to digital versions of excellent tabletop games, with winners like Catan, Lost Cities, and Risk: Factions all getting the boot at one point or another. But nothing could sting quite as much as the delisting of Uno, the fast, easy-to-grasp card game that typically induces bouts of excited yelling. Not only could you play Uno when all the participants lived in different states - there was also the option to put custom house rules into effect, or spice up the deck with themed DLC (including some Super Street Fighter II Turbo HD Remix goodness). And here's the kicker: the whole shebang cost less than an actual deck of Uno cards. Now it's gone. Excuse me, I... I need a moment.
Sonic the Hedgehog hasn't got a proper girlfriend. Sure, Amy throws herself at him all the time, but Sonic Generations clearly showed him holding her at arm's length while she continued to struggle in his direction. That's one relationship that's never going to work out. And as for Princess Elise… well, when did you last see her? 2006? Exactly. Her friends pointed out why what she was doing was wrong and she finally saw the light. She's asked Google to remove all mention of it. The results are pending.
So, seeing as time keeps marching on and he won't look this good for ever, Sonic has been attending speed dating evenings. In case you haven't experienced its wonders, this involves an evening of three-minute dates. If you like someone, you tick their name. Get a tick back and you share phone numbers. Simple. They say three minutes is enough time to know if you are interested in someone. Well, here's what the ladies thought of Sonic...
"You know that thing where you like a guy, but just wish he would shut the hell up? Yeah, that. He kept saying things like 'hey hey!' and 'Better luck next time'. I mean, I'm all for enthusiasm and a cheerful personality, because those things are great. But they're also SO ANNOYING."
"I think I decided I definitely wouldn't tick him when it got to the end of the three minutes and he stood up and said "Hey, I'll play with you some other time" and just sort of froze. The lady from the speed dating company had to come and usher him along to the next girl because he'd already used up two minutes of his time with her. My next date didn't know what to say - he couldn't get to his seat."
"It started off pretty well. I mean, he looks quite cool with those great big blue spines and winsome smile, but some pretty major red flags were waving as soon as he started bragging about all the gold rings he has. And then he said that if I was lucky, maybe I could have one. I mean, come ON – we only just met and he's already talking about giving me a ring?"
"Sad thing is, when the bell rung to signal it was time to move onto the next person, the guy stood up and banged his head on the light shade above the table, at which point he seemed to drop hundreds of the things. It was quite awkward, really. Nobody helped him pick them up. By the time I realised and offered to help, most of them had disappeared. I don't… I don't really know what I saw. The poor guy almost forgot his chili dog."
"Is nobody else seeing this? This isn't a guy at all. It's a hedgehog. The kind that gets stuck in cattle grids or ends up squashed on the side of the road. I mean, I'm a girl. A human. I couldn't ever get with a hedgehog. Aren't there laws against that sort of thing? If there aren't, there should be."
"The other thing is, even besides the physical aspect, how would you maintain a healthy emotional relationship with a hedgehog? At one point, I joked that he was a funny colour for a hedgehog. It must be a delicate subject for him, because he curled up into a ball and didn't come out for the rest of the speed date. I can't be putting up with that. This evening was a stupid idea, I should never have come."
"It was the strangest three minutes of my life. He sprinted the four feet from the previous table and flung himself down into the seat, throwing down this disgusting chili dog onto the table, which slid off, only for him to catch it before it hit the floor and then sort of twirl it in the air before making it land on the plate. It was like watching a cartoon. I don't like cartoons."
"Surprisingly, he told me he likes speed and running. I don't know why everyone thinks running is such a great and attractive pastime. I've been on all the dating sites and everyone seems to list running as one of their main interests. That and travelling. Me? I like eating cake. But at least by the time I'd thought about all the things I just told you, especially the bit about the cake, the three minutes was up and he ran off to the next girl. I didn't even catch his name. Sanic, wasn't it?"
"I actually quite liked the guy, at first. But then I asked him about his friends and what they do. From what I gather, there's some kid who flies a plane, some boxer-type who likes jewels and a big… cat? I thought he was teasing me. Nobody has a friend called Cream the Rabbit. At least nobody in the social circles I want to associate with."
"I asked him if he was talking about pets but he said no, and showed me a picture. They all look friendly enough, but, to be honest, I couldn't picture myself in that picture too. For that matter, I don't think anyone in the room would have looked right in that picture. I think maybe he should look for someone a bit more like himself."
"This guy is absolutely full of it. You know what he told me? He took part in the Olympic Games – both winter and summer – for the past 8 years. I can sort of picture it going by his physique, but I think I would have heard about a blue dude winning medals at some point in the past decade. I bet they're made of chocolate or something."
"He also said he saves the world every other week. And that he's been into space. And he's a racing driver. Oh, and he plays tennis competitively. And he's into MMA. You know, he also had the nerve to try and convince me he's a time traveller and went back into the past to fix the future, and when he went forward to check, it was all happy and pink and stuff. The guy's imagination is incredible, but it's also disturbing. I think he might be dangerous. Wait, did I mention to him where I work? Oh god, I think I did…"
"You know, after the previous guy had got up, this guy Sonic sat down and introduced himself. I said something like 'Sonic the Hedgehog… OK, let me just write that down' and started to write his name on the little card. By the 'c' I realised he was tapping his foot impatiently, and by the time I'd finished writing the second 'g', he was stretched out on the table, yawning his head off like I'd taken forever. It can't have been more than 10 seconds."
"I can't stand bad attitudes, but he seemed to think it is a positive attribute. In fact, when I asked him what he thought his best features were, he immediately said 'my attitude'. When I suggested maybe that wasn't a good thing, he said it used to make him really popular. Naturally, I picked up on the 'used to', but then the time was up and he said 'Better get going', and left. I don't think we'll be ticking each other."
"I know age is just a number, but it does matter a little bit. This guy said he was out on his own as early as 1991. I wasn't even born until 1997, so he must be almost old enough to be my dad. I know he doesn't look that old (although it's hard to tell because he doesn't look like most people), but the thought does weird me out a little bit."
"I did actually raise it in the conversation, and his response was unnerving. He said "To be this good takes ages". And then he winked. I don't know what he was talking about, but it chilled me to my very core. I think I'm better off with someone closer to my own age."
"I thought he seemed really nice, but he got a phone call right in the middle of our time and I saw the name 'Amy' flash up on his phone. I asked who it was and he said 'oh, no-one'. When I pushed some more, he conceded that he and she used to date, briefly, but that 'now she won't take the hint'. So yeah, I suspect there's unfinished business there."
"Then, after the dating evening had finished, some of the girls were laughing at something on one of their phones. It was a video that looked like that guy Sonic was being kissed by a girl who was dressed up like a princess, with floating crystals or something. It looked like some kind of ritual... and he looked drugged. Even unconscious at one point. If he's an actor or something, then I suppose that's cool, but I'm not really into LARPing. And that looked a hell of a lot like LARPing to me."
With being surgically constructed as we type, there's rarely been a better time to return to Eidos Montreal's triumphant first attempt to augment the classic series for a new generation. Not least because there's so much you probably missed first time around.
Deus Ex: Human Revolution is so dense that it’s ripe for in-jokes, and Lead Narrative Designer Mary DeMarle, writer James Swallow and Art Director Jonathan Jacques-Belletete didn’t disappoint when we begged for enlightenment…
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A part that didn’t make the final cut was on the top tier of Hengsha. “Man, you should have seen the architecture we had. And the view!” says Jonathan Jacques-Belletete. “We had a look-out spot where you saw the eco city all the way across, with its layered districts influenced by rice paddies, and the Tai Yong Medical skyscraper monolithically standing in the middle of it all. All that with a humongous sun burning your eyes...”
In FEMA, a pocket secretary provides the names of Eidos Montreal employees that have been added to the ADEX list – troublemakers who should be rounded up and imprisoned. Meanwhile in Detroit, Detective Frank McCann and Officer Champagne are both named after designers, while Audio Director Steve Szczepkowski works at the local LIMB clinic.
The colour yellow gets quite an outing in DX:HR, so much so that the art team decided to leave multiple buckets of yellow paint in the game’s corridors and construction zones.
Nods to the original Deus Ex game abound in DX:HR – on news broadcast ticker-tape you could read predictions about everything from the earthquake that would sink California to mentions of the original’s famous lemon-lime fizzy pop. “Probably one of the most memorable for me,” adds Mary DeMarle, “is the diatribe that’s being delivered by a hobo ‘doomsayer’ during the Detroit riots. He’s trying to warn people about the danger posed by the Illuminati and pretty much predicts the coming of the Grey Death.”
Final Fantasy XXVII can be seen throughout the game, first added in the very week that Eidos was acquired by Square Enix. “You have no idea how serious the whole affair got!” laughs Jonathan Jacques-Belletete. “It went to the highest echelons of Square Enix’s hierarchy to get it approved for inclusion in the game.”
The most secretive email exchange in DX:HR is in a mini-storage unit in Hengsha – and it’s that of a hacker who recorded the opening conspirator conference. He’s also responsible for every Nigerian scam email in the game. “The last mail on his computer is an automated failure report from the program he created to send out these mails,” says Mary DeMarle. “It lists where every Nigerian email can be found. I love this mail especially, because it was written for me by one of the programmers!”
Meetings are good for something. “The first cutscene I wrote, I did to kill time while waiting for a meeting to finish,” James Swallow reveals. “It was used, almost totally unchanged, as the final scene in the game. Stay to the end of the credits, kids.”
Game advertising is all but inescapable these days, with promotions for big franchises taking up space in everything from mall kiosks to thousands-of-dollars-per-second Super Bowl ads. It's gotten to the point where even those who don’t really play games still have some familiarity with the sequel-laden mainstays that you and I know so well. But even amidst all the hype trains and ridiculously expensive marketing campaigns, some entries in the most universally recognized game franchises are all but forgotten to time.
There's been plenty of discussion about the , but many of those hail from Japanese franchises that might not register with players from other parts of the world. So instead, here are the most delightfully obscure games from the most recognizable Western-made franchises on the market. Mention these to your parents, siblings, friends, teachers, whoever; you'll see their eyes light up in understanding when you say the series name, only to shift to utter befuddlement when you reach the actual title.
As you'll soon find, some of these little-known games have been buried under layers of history, from the days before the brand name blew up. Grand Theft Auto 3 is really when the masses started paying attention to Rockstar's brand of open-world crime sprees, so the original top-down GTA from 1997 is already pretty obscure. Even fewer people have played GTA: London, 1969, a UK-themed expansion pack that adds the entire series' only real-world location to the base game. Then, on top of all that, sits GTA: London, 1961, an expansion pack to the expansion pack. It's enough to make your head spin.
So, is it any good? Since there's barely any plot to the early GTA games, London, 1961 can't offer the same level of backstory-revealing goodness as later spin-offs like Liberty City and Vice City Stories. But if you just want to add some more content to your retro car thieving, then you might as well enjoy the extra missions added in this bit of PC-exclusive freeware.
Contrary to what Activision would like you to believe, not every Call of Duty game is an instant best-seller. Black Ops: Declassified was put in a pretty unenviable position, releasing as a PS Vita exclusive on the same day as . That meant that it targeted a demographic that largely prefers its military FPS action on consoles, if they even owned Sony's struggling handheld system to begin with. Of course, it certainly doesn't help things when your game is horrendously buggy, has broken AI, and gets critically panned for boasting a single-player campaign that can be completed in less than an hour.
So, is it any good? No, unless you're a diehard CoD lore buff who's desperate to know what kind of mass murdering went down between the events of Black Ops and Black Ops 2. If Declassified has taught us anything, it's that CoD's speedy gameplay was never meant to accommodate touchscreen controls, and having two colons in your game titles looks a bit silly.
Kratos is a legend among gamers, known far and wide for his ability to be unreasonably angry at all times and turn any violent action into a quick-time event. Excessive bloodshed and gore has always been crucial to God of War's brand of combo-centric combat, so you might wonder how all that could possibly work on a tiny, narrow screen. God of War: Betrayal aimed to find out, plopping the Ghost of Sparta onto Java-compatible flip phones in a time before Apple's App Store even existed. Though the action shifted from 3D to 2D, there were still plenty of mythical monsters to slice through and execute with carefully timed button presses.
So, is it any good? Depends on your expectations. It's certainly a bit strange to see Kratos reduced to a dinky pixelated sprite, and the lack of music or sound effects beyond the occasional, singular drum beat makes the brutal beatdowns feel about as epic as a stroll through the library. But given the limitations of the Java engine, it's impressive that Betrayal still manages to retain the pace and flow of God of War combat on a 2D plane, even if you're mashing the 'OK' button instead of Square.
Over 30 years later, stacking blocks and making them disappear in Tetris still hasn't gotten old. The formula is almost too perfect, since any attempts to jazz it up usually end up feeling convoluted or gimmicky. That didn't stop the N64-exclusive Tetrisphere from trying, taking the basic tetromino-dropping gameplay and wrapping it around a giant orb of colored blocks. In addition to the procession of shapes, you can also use an array of unorthodox puzzle power-ups like magnets and ray guns to bore to the center of the Tetrisphere a little quicker. And for whatever reason, you've got a bunch of bug-eyed androids to keep you company (none of which seem remotely Russian).
So, is it any good? Yes, actually. Having to manipulate pieces in a 3D space bends your brain out of its Tetris comfort zone, and there's a lot more blocky real-estate to cover in search of the perfect fit for your current piece. Also, the techno-rave soundtrack is pretty rad.
The Madden NFL series spans a whopping five console generations and counting, which is pretty staggering to think about. And at the same time that the Sega Genesis and Super Nintendo were getting annual Madden sequels starting as early as 1990, only one entry in the series ever made it to the Turbo Duo console. To understand why, ask yourself: did you or anyone you know even own a Turbo Duo? If you answered 'yes', then you might also be familiar with that GI Joe reject . But what was I talking about again? Oh, right: 16-bit Madden on an unpopular console that tried implementing disc drives just a bit too early.
So, is it any good? Not unless you're a sucker for FMVs peppering all the sluggish gridiron action, including such riveting live-action scenes as the game-opening coin toss (complete with slow zoom on the quarter) and three-second-long endzone celebrations. But I can safely say that there is no greater virtual representation of John Madden than .
The Sims is one of the most successful game franchises of all time, delighting players with just the right mix of mundane suburban life and godlike power (including, but not limited to, trapping your Sims in the bathroom until they die). For those who prefer the chibi style of character design in something like MapleStory, there's MySims, a spin-off full of super-deformed denizens to occupy your virtual dollhouse. And beyond that is a series of spin-off spin-offs that have nothing to do with domestic life. Instead, these games involve minigame parties, kart-racing, kid-friendly espionage, or - in the case of SkyHeroes - full-on aerial dogfighting and races through mid-air checkpoints.
So, is it any good? Heck yeah. For my money, I'll always go with a goofy, colorful flight combat game over something that aims for photorealism like Ace Combat, especially if it can tap into the nostalgia of Star Fox and Diddy Kong Racing. Plus, those little customizable jet fighters are just adorable.
A full year before Uncharted: Fight for Fortune turned third-person action into a surprisingly fun card game, Assassin's Creed took a stab at the world of CCGs with the Recollection app on iOS. The game itself is actually just called Tactics, to be exact: a real-time duel where players summon Animus memories instead of casting spells. Despite there only being three main areas on the board, the strategy is quite complex, since you'll be micromanaging your agent cards to vie for territory control all while a day-cycle timer constantly ticks down. Outside of the matches, there's also plenty of opportunity for creative deckbuilding, given the sizeable 200+ card pool.
So, is it any good? Yes. Like any CCG, this game makes its money through in-app purchases used to buy card packs, so stay away if you can't use your virtual wallet responsibly. But for any AC fan craving a strategic change of pace, Tactics (alongside all the other supplementary concept art and cutscenes in Recollection) makes for an impressively worthwhile companion app.
You can't make it ten clicks through the internet without someone cracking a (very likely weak) Half-Life 3 joke. But everyone's who's clamoring for fresh, unfamiliar content in Valve's seminal FPS series should take it upon themselves to seek out the little-known Half-Life: Decay. It's understandable that PC-centric players might've missed it, since this expansion was developed exclusively for the PlayStation 2 port of Gordon Freeman's first interdimensional escapade. Here's the thing: instead of controlling Freeman on his lonesome, Decay is actually a co-op campaign starring two female scientists - Colette Green and Gina Cross - that occurs parallel to Gordon's adventure during the Black Mesa Incident.
So, is it any good? Most definitely. Defending yourself against Xen aliens and the military clean-up crew is just as fun with a buddy by your side, as reinforced in Half-Life 2 - and unlike Alyx Vance, this player-controlled teammate doesn't have to deliver dialogue that awkwardly dances around the fact that you never speak. And Decay's emphasis on two-woman, first-person puzzles almost seems like a precursor to Portal 2's co-op. Plus, there's a secret mission that lets you can play as a Vortigaunt. Oh yes.
Alas, Silent Hill fans, I come bearing tragic news, for the highly anticipated , we've decided to put aside the Silent Hill that could have been to think about those that could still totally be.
Here we've listed the developers who could create chapters in a Silent Hill anthology, whose unique talents could play to what makes Silent Hill so beloved and unforgettable. If we say it loud and long enough, it's entirely possible that this could exist. Just keep running toward the light in the gloom.
Alan Wake is a perfect template for a bite-sized Silent Hill experience. Remedy intimately understands how geography can impact mood, turning the pine forests of the US northwest into an oppressive landscape for Alan’s nightmares. They also understand how to adapt horror to an episodic format, sustaining tension throughout short levels, bringing the unease to a creepy crest at the very end. And in both Alan Wake and American Nightmare, Remedy showed they can blur the line between realities, twisting our perceptions and short-circuiting our expectations.
All of that experience is reason enough to wish they’d take a crack at a Silent Hill experience, but it’s the terrifying Mr. Scratch that seals it. Most of Silent Hill’s enemies are creeping, unknowable things, but Mr. Scratch, the dark embodiment of Alan’s ego, is all the more terrifying because he’s so recognizable. He simply gives into the impulses that we all have - to take what we want, shove others out of our way, and shape the world to our own specific liking. It would be intriguing to explore a relationship with a denizen of Silent Hill that’s as charming as he is disturbing.
Here's the thing with Silent Hill, it needs to be really freaking weird. That's what I adored about the series' early entries: each one took something familiar - a hospital or a shopping mall - and made it hostile and alien. These games didn't feel like anything else out there, and that unfamiliarity is what made them so scary. When thinking about who could do the bizarre atmosphere of Silent Hill justice, one name jumps to the top of the list: Grasshopper Manufacture.
With a track record that includes Lollipop Chainsaw and No More Heroes, Grasshopper Manufacture and Goichi Suda have a special brand of strange that permeates everything they touch. They've dipped their toe in the horror genre before with Fatal Frame IV. This would be their opportunity to dive headlong into the dark side and make it their own. It would be crass, it would be stylish, and it sure as hell wouldn't feel like any other Silent Hill game - and that's the point. If there's one thing PT demonstrated, it's that you can break the Silent Hill mold and still have a horror game that captures our imaginations.
The Evil Within was easily one of the most contentious games of 2014, and even now the gaming world is divided on whether it's the second-coming of Resident Evil or destined for the bin. But if developer Tango Gameworks did one thing right with this grotesque action-horror, it was coming up with an exceedingly scary concept and pushing it to the limit. If that passion could be redirected into a subtler narrative that's just as frightening, a Tango-directed Silent Hill could be the unsettling child of the horror genre's two greatest rivals.
While The Evil Within (Tango's only gaming endeavor thus far) focused heavily on action sequences, it was arguably at its best when you were simply walking around a house, poking at fresh brains and trying to discover the mystery behind the specter that's relentlessly hunting you. It also knows how to make the immortal stalker concept work, with Boxman exhibiting all the terrifying immortality of Pyramid Head with an extra helping of gore. Perhaps most importantly, Shinji Mikami and his team are adept at realizing their vision with grace and focus, so a Silent Hill game from them would almost assuredly strike at the heart of what makes the series tick.
You might've heard of a PS1 rarity by the name of LSD: Dream Emulator. It's not so much a game as it is a first-person simulation of an acid trip that oscillates between surreal weirdness and full-on terror. Without any goals or direction, you simply wander through 32-bit renditions of disconnected dream sequences, completely unsure of how your surroundings will react to your presence. Ask anyone who's plunged headfirst into this madness (or ), and you'll see just how often things take a turn into deeply disturbing territory. It gets to the point that the player feels like they're being strangled by paranoia and disorientation.
Don't be deceived by the crude graphics; LSD is capable of some truly skin-crawling stuff, like walls inexplicably plastered with creepy face textures, or is still up, so anything's possible.
People often (incorrectly) reduce Gone Home as to nothing more than a "walking simulator", but you know what? There's nowhere that Fullbright's brand of environmental design and exploration would be more at home than the sleepy burg of Silent Hill. Gone Home already toyed with player expectations, building up suspense and horror through simple audio cues, deft storytelling, and a crushing sense of loneliness - a Fullbright Silent Hill game would simply ratchet up those feelings tenfold.
If you're playing Silent Hill for the combat, you're playing the wrong game. Instead, a Fullbright-developed Silent Hill would drop the player into the derelict city long after the horror has since passed - though the evidence of the atrocities committed by its inhabitants still lingers. You'd explore abandoned buildings, reading notes and taking in clues, piecing the story together as you wander through the city's haunting streets. And then… the fog rolls in, and the real terror begins.
Between working on Danganronpa and the Zero Escape series, developer Spike Chunsoft knows how to inject a poignant sense of despair, dread, and (most of all) helplessness in their games. Silent Hill thrives on these emotions. It wants to instill them deep within your psyche, often without you even realizing it. The thematic harmony at work between game and developer makes Spike Chunsoft a natural fit for this long-running horror franchise.
And on a more pragmatic note, what's the one thing people complain about when they complain about Silent Hill? The gameplay. By design, Silent Hill games feel clunky, which is sort of the point but people still don't like it. If Spike Chunsoft were to transform Silent Hill into a visual novel, that awkwardness would be eliminated and you'd be free to focus on all the creepy environments and brain-teasing puzzles. It also allows for a greater focus on narrative, which is important when your backdrop literally runs on the inner turmoil of its characters.
Though From Software is best known for making you want to throw your game system out the window when you lose to that one boss for the tenth freaking time, the company is equally versed at building a living story from vague whispers and hints. Though you could charge through Dark Souls or Bloodborne without ever learning their lore, players that pay close attention can discover frightening and fascinating worlds hidden just out of sight. Silent Hill is all about the horror of what could be lurking beyond that impenetrable fog, so From Software's unique brand of subtle dread would be perfect for low-visibility terror.
Much like other Silent Hill games are built upon subtle clues that can go ignored if you don't pay attention (heck, P.T. has a full story to it that some players never notice), From Software is adept at hiding hints of story in every facet of a game, from to item descriptions to the structure of the world itself. While the company has never done a psychological horror game the likes of Silent Hill, it wouldn't be too tricky to scale back its action-focused elements to hone in on atmosphere. After that it's familiar, lamp-lit territory. The true question is whether From Software could scale back its desire to make you suffer under crushing difficulty instead of just deep-seated fear, but I bet it could pull that off. Just this once.
This impressive recreation of the International Space Station by Jack Parsons, an environmental artist from Galactic Cafe’s The Stanley Parable. “It’s about 1.33 times larger than life,” he says. “Making it to the exact dimensions makes it feel way too cramped inside.” Construction of the ISS involved using ten stacks of quartz, a double chest of white wool, and about 60 stacks of nether brick slabs. “Half a nether fortress went into those solar arrays,” he says. It took about two days to design in Creative mode, and then he spent three days building it in Survival using netherrack scaffolds. Parsons says that he plans to carry on tweaking it to correspond with events that happen to the real-life International Space Station, “adding and removing docked vehicles and even rearranging modules when the time comes.”
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The solar panels generate 160 volts DC for their systems. When the Earth eclipses the Sun, rechargeable batteries keep the station ticking over.
The Cupola module hangs below the ISS, giving the best views of the Earth’s surface 431 kilometres away. Astronauts sleep next door.
The Zvezda module contains the life-support and communications systems, as well as docking points. It can also sleep six crew members.
Summarising how much shooters have changed since the first time somebody fired a gun in a game is impossible. There are too many variations, whether you’re talking about the smelly machismo of a series like Duke Nukem, or the agonising firework displays of a ‘bullet hell’ arcade game. Instead, we’ve spoken to a number of the industry’s leading developers about their favourite shooter features from times gone by. Suffice to say that the genre’s history doesn’t begin with the launch of Call of Duty 4.
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Name: Adrian Chmielarz, Developer: The Astronauts, Key game: Bulletstorm
“I’d love to see someone bring back the forgotten hero of the shooter genre: a level you know inside out. Most modern shooters are all about pushing forward. You enter a combat area, deal with the enemies, move on to the next area, rinse, repeat. At best there’s a little bit of backtracking. Now, recall Doom 2. The map overlay, and getting familiar with the place. Cleaning up rooms from demons. Discovering secrets. Opening up new areas and connections, morphing parts of the level into something different. The levels were alive, you could feel their presence – they were a friend and a foe at the same time.”
Name: Lasse Middelbo Outzen, Developer: Press Play, Key game: Max: The Curse of Brotherhood
“A game we keep going back to here at the studio is Sunset Riders from Konami, which we play through a PC coin-op emulator. We originally picked it up out of sheer nostalgia, but we soon realised that the slow-moving bullets actually provided fantastic gameplay – especially when played as four-player co-op. The game is basically a 2D side-scrolling shooter starring pink cowboys who have to shoot their way through the land. What really makes it shine is that it is constantly throwing upgrades and new gameplay at you. It is a good example of how few [ingredients] are required to create a fantastic game.”
Name: Jamie Winsor, Developer: Undead Labs, Key game: State of Decay
“Bunny hopping, or bunny jumping, was the best way to separate the scrubs from the pros. You might ‘know’ a level in a modern shooter, but mastering the fastest route to the best power-ups or to reach a choke point faster than your opponents was sometimes more important than your aim. It wasn’t about just mashing the space bar, either, it was about rhythm. The technique typically involves a mix of jumping, strafing, and camera movement done in concert to gradually increase your movement speed to a point that was greater than you could achieve by just holding the button down. Couple this with rocket or grenade jumping and you were sure to get the upper hand in map position.”
“Quake is very much about [visible ammo] with the missiles flying around – you saw them, you knew when they would hit you, and you’d take one step to the side. Nowadays, by the time you’ve seen a missile, you’re dead. Devs don’t draw in bullets any more because they move very fast. Instead, when somebody shoots, they make an invisible ray from the gun to where it would hit, and then check if a player’s there. The bullet does not actually exist in the game. I miss that. I want bullets. I want to be able to dodge a bullet by a millimetre and not be like, ‘here’s a ray, it has 95% accuracy’. It’s why a knife throw kill is really fun, because the knife is actually there and you can see how it flies.”
Name: Stewart Gilray, Company Just Add Water, Key game: Oddworld: New ‘N’ Tasty
“I’ve played through Oddworld: Stranger’s Wrath three or four times at least and each time I’ve done it I use ammo slightly differently, [which affects] how quickly you can dispatch some of the big bounties in different ways. It’s true that using live ammo in certain ways will get you through quicker, but you won’t get as big an award, or if you do it more stealthily you get more moolah, but it takes longer to finish. And that’s great, it breaks up [the usual routine] where you’ve got a gun that fires lead – oh the character’s dead, move on. I got kind of bummed when someone said in a review for Stranger’s Wrath HD last year that ‘this is the most linear game I’ve ever played in my life’.”
If you like scaring off potential lovers by turning your bed into a sea full of stuffed animals, then have I got the list for you. Video game land is filled to the brim with critters ripe for shrinking down into huggable plushie form, so I’ve collected a list of the very best so you can remind your crush that you’re also a gamer /thank you very much/ as they slowly back out the door.
From Mud Crabs to Piranha Plants, here are the ten most unusual, yet massively desirable video game plushies you can buy right now.
This handsome beast has been “scientifically engineered for maximum huggability and affection.” He also talks.
Lovingly: take my money.
You can .
Just look at that round squishable face! Those beady little eyes! Those pathetic little wings! Who wouldn’t want this spherical yellow chubster taking up all the room in their bed? Your partner can sleep on the floor.
You can .
Not only is this friendly monster adorably fuzzy, he also acts as a handy storage device. His gaping maw opens up at a terrifying angle, gifting you with plenty of storage space for your beard clippings.
You can .
Those cold, dead eyes have seen a lot of unspeakable things. This Silent Hill series memento totally won’t murder you in your sleep…
You can .
Bethesda really know how to make a good plush. They’ve got so many great additions that it’s was too difficult to narrow it down to just the Elcor, so here’s a cuddly Mud Crab that you can prop up on the shelf next to him.
You can .
Nintendo does an incredibly strong line in huggable things, but this toothy little bastard chomped the rest of the competition. Just don’t get your fingers too close to his mouth.
You can .
Always there for you in your darkest hour, the companion cube is a classic that will never let you down… unless you’re near an open flame.
You can .
The chick transforms into an egg. Nothing more needs to be said.
You can .
They missed a trick by not making this out of velcro, but at least you won’t have to worry about being rolled into a ball of miscellaneous household objects any time soon.
You can .
Ok, so the pig’s vacant stare freaks me out even more than meeting the gaze of an Enderman, but this colourful menagerie would be right at home in anyone’s collection.
Unless you've spent the last few years swan-diving into your McDuckian money pool and smoking cigars made of rolled-up Benjamins, you've probably noticed how expensive gaming can be. Paying several hundred dollars for a console is a pricey barrier to entry, but once you're up and over, the cost of games themselves can be equally daunting. Sure, there's always Xbox's to pull from, but what happens when those just don't satisfy and you need some new games on the cheap?
Well, you can come here, where we're gathering a list of great recent titles that cost $10 (£6.70) or less. When used game shops let you down and garage sales offer nothing more than John Madden Football '93, you can check here for top-notch games that'll keep your backlog and wallet pleasantly plump.
PS3:
Poor male-model hopeful Raiden has never been a fan favorite (which might have something to do with him usurping Snake's Metal Gear throne in Solid 2), but turn him into a sombrero-wearing cyborg ninja with a mechanical dog, and that changes everything. Gone are the stealth tactics of yesteryear, because in you go on the offensive with high-powered sword moves and a slow-motion Blade Mode where you quite literally slice enemies to pieces. But fast-paced and exciting as it is, Revengeance never forgets to be a Metal Gear game - the fact that you get to go nine rounds with a malevolent American senator is proof enough of that.
PS4: .)
You wouldn't think the tale of a few meandering rectangles would twist the heartstrings much, but soundly squares up with that notion. A puzzle-platformer starring a cast of colorful shapes that slowly expands over their journey through a defunct computer program, Thomas Was Alone challenges you to move all blocks through a given level to their appropriate exits before you can advance. Already intellectually stimulating, the whole experience gets an extra layer of charm from a witty British narrator who tells you all about the blocks' thoughts and feelings, making them feel like interesting and empathetic characters despite their lack of dialogue/vocal chords.
iPhone and iPad:
Most of the time, it's wise to steer clear of games that force you to read an expository database to understand what the heck is going on, unless you're looking for a good sleep aid. I say most of the time because now and then a title like Year Walk comes along. Based around a type of divination in Swedish folklore called Årsgång, Year Walk is an adventure game where you face supernatural peril for a chance to see the future. Alone it's a ghostly journey through a forest full of cryptic symbols that'll have you twitching every time your house creaks. But it gets even more enthralling with the addition of the companion app, which explains the terrifying nature of those symbols to make the whole experience even scarier. You'll probably need a real sleep aid after this one, and a night light.
PS4:
There's a little liar in all of us, and there's also a little doofus who will fall for anything someone else's inner-fibber says. Fibbage exploits both for comedy gold, because whether you're fooling or being fooled, it's going to be hilarious. In Fibbage, up to eight players (who can be just about anywhere and still participate on their smartphones) are given a fill-in-the-blank sentence and must insert a convincing (or just hysterical) falsehood for anonymous submission. You get points for guessing the truth or convincing others that your lie is legit, but the real reward is seeing just how ludicrous your question-answer combinations get. The color of the Golden Gate Bridge is officially called Massive Horse Orange? Who knew!
PS3, PS4 and PS-Vita:
The oft-forgotten older sibling of Journey, is all about how it feels to be a petal drifting along on a summer breeze. And... that's it. The entire point of Flower is to drift calmly through a melodic and serene natural setting, and that's what makes it so brilliant. It was designed to be relaxing and peaceful, which is exactly what it does through its simple gameplay, beautiful settings, and gorgeous classical soundtrack. Flower is all about experiencing a place and a feeling, taking in the beauty around you without the stress of a mandatory goal. Even if you don't think this sort of game is up your alley, at less than $10 it could well be worth a try. You might like it more than you thought.
iPhone and iPad:
Comics are a pretty linear artform, so on those random occasions when you read panels out of order because the illustrator decided to get all artistic on you, it's usually more confusing than enlightening. But what if reading those panels out of order actually significantly changed the story for the better? That's the premise behind Framed, a puzzle game depicted through comic panels that you can switch at will. Altering their arrangement changes the story dynamically, and can mean the difference between your noir protagonist getting shot in the back or making it to safety. Combine quick thinking with a unique premise and crisp art that'll keep your eyes happily locked on the screen, and you've got the best of comics and games wrapped up in one intriguing package.
Xbox 360: .)
No one does bullet-strewn testosterone-fests better than Rockstar Games, and while all eyes are on GTA 5 these days, the company's entry in the Max Payne series deserves more than a quick backwards glance. is a humanizing look at a noir action-hero who's hit rock bottom (and the rocks at the bottom of his glass), as scenes of explosive Bullet Time action are interspersed with talk of addiction and morality. You can easily play through with reckless abandon, but what makes this game stand out even now is how it brings us closer to the man himself, and hope that he'll somehow find his way.
Xbox 360:
The latest addition to Square Enix's stylish shooter series, Hitman: Absolution takes some time to focus on Agent 47's softer side. That softer side is still fine with strangling target or leaving them in the desert to die, but now he has a young, mysterious girl named Victoria to look after, which gives us a look at who 47 is underneath the poker face. The game also takes a detour from its super-serious predecessors by including outrageous, sometimes downright cartoonish characters who give the experience an enjoyable edge of corniness. Combine that with the strong, choice-based missions the series is known for, and this is one to keep in your crosshairs.
For as long as there have been video games there have been systems in place to ensure that those video games do not continue on unabated. After all, what good is a truly endless experience, an interaction without incentive? Once the initial novelty wears off, what then? Without the likes of the humble health bar to affirm our actions, to measure our gaming greatness, we'd all be utterly bored by now.
Health bars - hidden or otherwise, are as vital to gaming as the lifeblood in Zelda's HUD hearts are to Link. They come in many forms, measuring our proximity to defeat in everything from blood to - well, everything listed here. Yes, you see as games have evolved, so have our means of measuring our ability - or not - to play them well. New stories, worlds, tasks and design ideas have forced the noble health bar out of its comfort zone and demanded that it adapt, to measure all kinds of different successes and failures in a plethora of new contexts. All pretty much hit you with restart hammer when depleted, but it's not the destination that matters, it's the journey. Thusly, today's big list of things looks at just some of the many, highly intriguing alternatives to the classic life bar. Whatever you do, don't let 'em hit zero.
They say that 'the heart wants what the heart wants', and what the heart wants most of all is not to implode out of sheer bloody terror. An EKG, or electrocardiogram device, measures the rate at which that most vital of vital organs operates. It's also rather useful for telling medical professionals when to start beating on your chest like an angry ape. Fear Effect uses the machine's iconic pulsing symbol in lieu of a regular health bar, with enemy attacks serving only to increase its rapidity. Green is good, blipping along at a steady rate, whilst red and yellow represent a state of declining health.
Players can enhance their chances of survival by 'calming down' the protagonist - either by way of stealthy play or through the completion of in-game puzzles. Failure to do so will effectively cause your avatar to suffer a massive and fatal heart attack. We're not exactly sure where science stands on the whole 'death by fright' debate, but it's a fair bet that the game's lithe leading lady hasn't been wolfing down any deep fried mars bars lately, so it can't be her cholesterol to blame…
If only every individual came complete with a sanity meter. It'd certainly make relationships a whole hell of a lot simpler. Knowing your ditzy misfits from your grade-A nutters is an evermore-essential skill. With access to the heady world of online dating, the average person's exposure to amorous lunatics has increased exponentially. This sort of thing should be a default widget on everyone's profile.
Video game sanity meters have been around for quite a while now, though few are held in such high regard as that which appears in Silicon Knight's Eternal Darkness. The concept proved to be so darn popular in fact that Ninty even opted to copyright it, presumably so that they could accurately gauge lost Metroid fans' continuing levels of despair. Unlike many of the entries on this list, ED's meter isn’t an outright replacement for the health gauge, though failure to top up your 'mental mana' will cause all sorts of freaky disturbances to appear, eventually leading to your death. Contributing factors include being spotted by an enemy, or witnessing a terrifying event. Thank God nobody asked the protagonists to play Too Human then…
If there's one fatal flaw in the whole 'average everyday hero' trope then it's this: real people tend to be absolutely bloody awful at handling pressure. Heroes undergo great pains to achieve their ends, overcoming fear itself in the name of goodness, truth and the philanthropic spirit. Real people smash up their keyboards and scream highly specific grievances at their pets. See the difference? A hero's courage isn't for everyone. Some folks have it, most don’t. Where the likes of Nathan Drake can happily laugh off a good dozen-or-so near-death experiences (seriously, did he piss off Death from the Final Destination franchise?) most of us would sooner be reduced to an amorphous wailing wreck.
So it's rather refreshing to find a game in which our avatars actually do the same. Capcom's Clock Tower 3 even includes a 'panic meter', which fills up any time that the lead character of Alyssa encounters one of the game's many monsters. Unlike the aforementioned sanity meter however, this mechanic can actually cause lil' Ally to become damn near-uncontrollable, as she sobs, stops, trips and outright refuses to listen to reason i.e. 'use your health potions' or 'hide over here'. Sounds about right to me.
Lawyers, as a rule, tend not to lack for self-confidence, though honesty is another matter entirely. (*He says, before being sued for 18 quintillion dollars*). It's interesting to note then, that the Ace Attorney franchise isn't so much concerned with the protagonist's self-assurance as it is with the confidence he can inspire in others - namely both judge and jury. Likewise, prosecutor par excellence Miles Edgeworth requires the absolute truth in order to claim victory. Talk about Opposite Land... Still, these concepts remain vital to the series' success, forcing players to really do their homework in order to succeed, as opposed to when playing more, shall we say, 'accusation-happy investigators'. Alright we're talking about you Cole Phelps. You'd never have worked it out on your own.
Also known as the 'penalty meter', these gauges reflect how far the player is from earning him or herself an instant failure. Rather than 'dying' outright, the presiding judge will instead order the player to simply shut up, thereby preventing any additional evidence from being exposed. Lack of facts means a lost case, no matter how well things were progressing up to that point. Penalties can be incurred in a number of ways, though most relate to proper lawyering faux-pas - i.e. presenting irrelevant information, causing numerous interruptions or generally wasting everyone's time.
How ironic that a game as maddeningly frustrating as Dr. Jekyll Mr. Hyde's NES 'adaptation' should include its very own 'anger meter'. Perhaps they ought to have stuck one on the front cover, next to a shot of that man's head exploding in Scanners. 'Anger level: Dome Blaster'. As it stands, the game's actual anger meter measures how many hits Dr. J - no, the other one - can endure before morphing into his alter ego. Once changed, Hyde can only revert to his human form by defeating scores of enemies, lessening his anger with every successful kill.
The aim here is to help either persona to reach the church. Jekyll is on his way to get married, while Hyde appears to be terested in battling floating demon heads. J sidles to the right, overcoming the usual assortment of church-goers' woes - namely attack dogs and laxative-gulping birds, while H shuffles his way to the left, fighting off all manner of hell spawn in the process. While the game does boast an additional health bar, most folks aren't really likely to notice, so busy will they be slamming their skulls into the TV in vexation.
A solitary 'health bar' shared between as many as four cack-handed friends? What could possibly go wrong? Rock Band's crowd meter is all about giving the people exactly what they want - good music, played in time, with a minimum of drug-induced tirades, prissy refusals to play or other such rockstar-related nonsense. Failure to keep the tunes coming results in your immediate death.
No wait… you're just made to start all over again, like the world's crappiest cover band freaking out at a high school talent show. Potential hits to the meter include everything from missing big notes to the police happening upon that one dead groupie at the back of your tour bus. No, not really. You'll have to wait for Rock Band 4 for that...
Ah the morality meter. What better way to adjudge ethical integrity than to plot the entirety of human experience along a single, simplistic gradient? "Have you been a good boy this month Mr. Manson? Well then I guess we can let those nine most recent murders slide. After all, you are a level 87 paragon". I hope that no one's actually taking their cues from these sorts of things, paying off the occasional genocide by helping a couple of ducks to cross the road.
So, what exactly is a morality meter doing on this list anyway? Surely those things are so far removed from the typical health bar as to warrant their own article? Well yes, for the most part. While it's true that ethical flubs seldom result in an outright failure, some games do choose to punish players long before the alternate endings roll in. Take the Adventures of Robin Hood for example, an MS-DOS game that for some strange reason allows players to turn a man a legendarily benevolent man - so altruistic he's practically an adjective for charity - into a right old greedy bastard. Accordingly, the townspeople could also play against type, by stringing up this bizarro Robin of Loxley by his neck. You didn't see that in the Kevin Costner film.
Despite being named as a 'Sanity Meter', Fahrenheit's unique take on the concept is really more akin to a 'stress gauge'. If the likes of Amnesia and Eternal Darkness can be considered 'straight horror', then this cult hit is more of a twisting and atmospheric thriller. Everything from guilt, to grief, to outright physical revulsion can cause the game's main players to lose stability, edging them ever closer to complete mental collapse. In short, where sanity meters are perfect for measuring shocks, scares and unbearable tension, a stress gauge instead assesses the slow decline of an everyday office worker. That is to say: everything up to and including their big, monitor throwing rage quit.
Interestingly, or should I say rather morbidly, the game doesn't shy away from displaying the results of these overloaded stress meters. Depending on the protagonist being played, as well as his or her current situation these outcomes can include suicide, arrest, job loss and even committal to a mental asylum. Ouch.
The first time I saw a tiny man pop up onscreen and yelp "Toasty!" during a brutal fight to the death, I instantly understood that the Mortal Kombat series likes to have fun with its secrets. What started out as a few easter eggs - a fleeting glimpse of Reptile here, Santa Claus flying in front of the moon there - has grown into a massive collection of clever throwbacks and cameos that'll skewer your brain's nostalgia receptors and splinter your funny bone (in a good way). And has over two decades of franchise history to reference, so you better believe it's got tons of amusing secrets and nods to the previous games.
In fact, some are so well-hidden that most players probably won't even notice them. I've rounded up the coolest (and most obscure) tidbits I could find in MKX, and you should know that many, many fighters died to bring you this information. Revealing these to your uninformed friends is sure to recall that old-school feeling when you knew the Fatality inputs and they didn't. Read up, then pass it on to your fellow kombatants.
If you've played through MKX's story mode, you might remember the scene where Sonya visits Jax as one of the least violent moments in the entire game. The grizzled Special Forces veteran clearly wants a simpler life, clad in farmer's overalls, tinkering away at an old tractor. But it seems like Jax also has a soft spot for two of the most advanced pieces of technology in the Lin Kuei ninja clan, judging by the 'Uncle Cyrax Stone Ground Mustard', 'Old Sektor's Ketchup', and 'LK-4D4 Engine Oil' posters hanging on the wall of the Briggs family's barn. Who knew these cyborgs were in the condiment and car repair businesses?
MK diehards will likely know that Tremor - a forthcoming DLC character with the power to cause earthquakes - is actually a throwback to Mortal Kombat: Special Forces, a spin-off brawler starring Jax that's among the . But what you might not know is that Tremor was actually playable once before, in a very unlikely venue: the handheld arena. By plowing through the Challenge Tower in the PlayStation Vita version of the ninth Mortal Kombat, you'll eventually reach Challenge #100, which (very briefly) puts you in control of the brown-clad, earth-bending ninja. And of course, he's going up against Jax.
This bit of character development is done in such a low-key way that 90% of players will probably miss it entirely. But kudos to Netherrealm Studios for debuting their first gay fighter in the Mortal Kombat franchise: Kung Jin, the smartaleck younger cousin to Kung Lao and an ace with his magical bow. During the story mode's that this dialogue is indeed a bit of very subtle exposition.
Whenever this pale-skinned Netherrealm sorcerer warps onto the scene, he's usually carrying a dagger and the severed head of an ogre-like creature. Those aren't props he bought from Party City in an attempt to psyche out his opponent - that poor decapitated monster is actually Modoch, the giant Oni sub-boss from Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance. It's never stated why Quan Chi felt the need to behead his minion 25 in-game years after the fact, though. Maybe Quan Chi decided that Moloch was too generic an MK character to keep on living.
Erron Black, the cowboy-looking bounty hunter loyal to Outworld's Kotal Kahn, typically relies on his trusty pistols during combat. But Erron can also switch to his Outlaw variation, where he brings a sword into battle to do a little stabbing in between all the shooting. This blade is actually formed from a Takartan's arm, the creatures (like Baraka) who can pop giant cleavers out of their forearms, Wolverine-style. Hopefully, Erron posthumously removed that Takartan's arm-blade, because otherwise... ouch. Also, the animation when Erron does his Takartan Stab command grab bears a striking resemblance to Sub-Zero's from the 2011 Mortal Kombat.
The MKX cast is chock full of talent, including some actors who you probably know from their many video game voiceovers. See if your ear picked up on all of these: Shinnok is voiced by Troy Baker (Joel from , pretty much anyone from any AAA game ever). Cassie Cage is played by Ashly Burch, who you probably know as Tiny Tina from Borderlands 2 or the titular sibling from Hey Ash Whatcha Playin'. Tricia Helfer, aka Number Six from Battlestar Galactica and EDI from Mass Effect 3, does an excellent Sonya Blade. And then there's Steve Blum, the Guinness World Record holder for most video game roles, doing his trademark gravelly voice for Sub-Zero (and a raspier tone for Reptile).
If you haven't seen the live-action Mortal Kombat flicks, you missed out on a particularly outstanding example of a cheesy video game movie one-liner. When Johnny Cage goes up against the hulking Goro, the four-armed brute snatches the shades off the Hollywood star's face and crushes them with a scoff. Johnny's retort during the ensuing fight scene is priceless: "Those were $500 sunglasses, asshole." Cut to 25 years later, and Cage is still bitter, saying "Don't you owe me some sunglasses?" before a match with Goro, or referencing .
Let's cap things off with a trio of easter eggs all related to Cassie Cage, daughter of Johnny Cage and Sonya Blade and the de facto leader of MKX's new generation of fighters. First up, you might've noticed that Cassie always removes some iPod-esque earbuds before a fight, which are presumably hooked up to an MP3 player tucked away in her gun holsters. And if you listen very, very closely, you can hear those earbuds blasting tunes from Mortal Kombat 3. Not a bad choice as far as prefight pump-up music goes.
Of all the Fatalities in MKX, Cassie's 'Selfie' finisher might be the most gruesomely hilarious. Long story short, she smashes her opponent's jaw till it's hanging by a hinge, then grabs their going-into-shock body and snaps a picture posing with her kill. The camera then zooms out to show that she's shared this mortifying image on her Facebook-parodying Friendships page, which has a rainbow logo in reference to . If you give it 30 seconds or so, you'll notice a stream of randomized comments popping up under the post, including (but not limited to) a Stryker cameo, a message from Noobde (the Twitter handle of MK co-creator Ed Boon), and Cassie's mother asking why she's friends with Kano on social media (y'know, the Cage family's most hated rival).
The Klassic tower is essentially MKX's arcade mode, and completing it rewards you with a brief slideshow ending for your chosen character. These are filled with cameos from old MK characters, like MK4's Taven in Kenshi and Takeda's epilogues. But the most interesting run-in happens in Cassie's ending, where Raiden tasks her with "hunting down a soul stealer." The intended target is implied to be Shang Tsung, but Cassie tracks down and offs an old man who, with his dying breath, identifies himself as Shujinko. If you played Mortal Kombat: Deception, you'll remember Shujinko as the protagonist in the expansive Konquest Mode single-player campaign, where he had the power to steal his opponent's moves (just not their physical form). An unfortunate case of mistaken identity, then.
And of course, there's Johnny Cage's alternate Ninja Mime costume, where he reprises his most well-known Hollywood role. Have you found any other excellent secrets or references in Mortal Kombat X? Share them in the comments, and we'll be sure to update this list with your suggestions!
New Game+, the rolling mode that just keeps on giving. Where once we players merely completed a title, before bidding said game a sad sayonara, nowadays its remains perfectly possible to recommence our adventures without missing a beat. Buoyed on by our successes and emboldened by high-level attributes, we bravely stride back into the starting lands to do it all over again. It's a little bit like reincarnation, a process of death and rebirth in which the affected claim to retain memories of their past lives. But what if instead of 'switching bodies' we simply rebooted back into our own, younger selves? What if New Game+ occurred in real life too?
Today's big nonsensical list of stuff looks at what exactly might happen if New Life+ (catchy, right?) were an real life possibility. What lessons could NG+ have to teach us about starting over with (the majority of) our skill sets left intact? Well, for a start…
If New Game+ allows users to bring a lifetime's worth of loot back to the beginning, then it stands to reason that New Life + really ought to do the same. Except of course that fitting all that tat inside of an already swollen womb isn't going to be easy. Though fans of physical comedy would certainly get a kick out of seeing a clown car's worth of homeware issuing, Mary Poppins-style, out of a thoroughly befuddled cervix (go ahead, write something weirder that that today) this particular method may not be ideal.
Instead, we're going to imagine that it all just warps into view at the exact moment you're born, daubing the entire operating theatre in a thick layer of quasi-futuristic gadgetry. Depending on when exactly you hit the reset switch that stuff might vary from a smartphone two decades ahead of the date to an XL can of mecha-dinosaur repellent. Just trust me on that last one… Sadly, you won't be in any kind of position to enjoy these reverse-Terminator theatrics, with half the room likely to panic, while the rest prepare to sell your stuff to the real life equivalents of Skynet. Sorry about that.
If ever there was a reason to return to your childhood, to the halcyon days of sugar highs and summertimes spent scoffing down sweets, it's this: kids - lucky little buggers that they are - enjoy all of the best toys. Toys, it should be mentioned that every thinking adult could feasibly afford, and yet remains socially prohibited from actually enjoying. Take the classic swing set or sandbox for example. There's not a man or lass alive who'd say no to a good hard swing, or so the folks at Tinder tell me, and yet not a one of them would actually consider buying one, at least not for themselves.
Indeed, it’s estimated that a whopping 900% of fathers sire their offspring with the express purpose of re-gaining access to these kinds of youthful amusements. "Move over Timmy, daddy has to test the structural integrity of your new Omni-playground 5000. Best come back in eight or nine hours"… New Life+ (and yes, that name is starting to sound like a Scientology pamphlet) would grant access to all sorts of similarly simple pleasures. Pedal powered cars, water guns, and all the diapers/nappies you can fill. Okay, so some of the Tinder folk are still totally into the latter as well, but here you could do with with complete social acceptability. What more could you possibly want?
Alright, I admit it, that last entry may have painted an overly rosy picture of the New Life+ experience. It wouldn't all be fun and frolicking, you know? There'd still be school to contend with, along with all of the associated sufferings. Coursework, homework, group work, work work... There's a reason most folks enjoy their 20s far more than their heavily scheduled teenaged years. On the plus side, everything up to the age or 18 (or more, depending on your IQ) should be an absolute breeze - a crushingly easy cakewalk that winds up winning you the reputation of a pint-sized Einstein.
Sure, you'll eventually level out, catching up to your genuine brain age before thoroughly disappointing your parents - "what do you mean our Valedictorian is lounging around in a pair of sweat-stained Y-fronts?" - but it'll be a hell of a ride while it lasts.
Speaking of associated sufferings, hitting the hard reset key would also involve an inevitable return to puberty. For some that will mean spots, for others, everything from violent mood swings to gangly growth spurts. Oh, and don't forget about all that unabashed narcissism. "Yes, daddy I know you've just worked an 89 hour shift in the salt mines of Grashkalanekt, but who else is going to drive me over to Todd Douchekowsky's ultra important party?". Apologies if that last excerpt seemed a little off base. I've decided to opt for the classic 'American-style adolescence' (as gleaned from watching movies) over the rather more mundane British equivalent. As stereotypes go, keggers and beer pong are a damn sight more glamorous than slurping cheap cider in a Tesco's car park…
The one advantage of tackling puberty in a New Game+ scenario is that you'll be far better prepared to handle it the second time around. Sure, you might've forgotten most of the particulars - who fancies who, what constitutes cool, and why any of this stuff actually matters - but a broad strokes understanding ought to be enough to give you the edge. Hell, you might even use your 'sports almanac'-like advantage to become the hippest kid in school.
Nothing wins popular acclaim quite like a deftly delivered comeback. Fortunately for you, you're now rocking an adult-sized brain in a teenage frame, which, as anyone who's ever pondered what it might be like to return to their younger years can attest, means only one thing. Yes folks, It's finally time to take revenge on those grim-faced and god-forsaken teachers. Now that's not to say you should be using your newfound powers to ridicule every educator. These skills ought to be reserved for the absolute worst of the worst. 'The patronising bastard', 'the power-mad moron', 'the shrill disciplinarian', and so on.
New Life+ would grant us all that opportunity to gaze on in smug-faced satisfaction as a hated enemy buckles under the pressure. Grill them with questions, belittle their abilities, lure them into a carefully considered trap before going full Good Will Hunting on their arses. It'd all be a little like returning to the starting area in a Dark Souls game. A one-time source of dread turned fertile hunting ground. Better get used to the endless detentions though…
Video games are chock full of figurative roadblocks, from simple level requirements to coloured key cards. The likes of Mass Effect even put the kybosh on our ability to hold a simple conversation, forcing players to complete a set number of 'stages' before any new info can be added. Sure, those crewmates may trust you with their very lives, but for some strange reason, just aren't comfortable discussing their back-stories prior to the next mission. Fancy sweet talking Ashley before the game says you're ready? Tough luck chump, come back when you're ten seconds away from the complete heat death of the universe.
Romance in the New Life + environment would likely prove to be even more galling. For one thing, you're going to be starting out as a baby, baby. A tiny little toddler with a keen appreciation for swimsuit models and/or manly grown-up man-types, but a tiny little toddler nonetheless. Now assuming you don't automatically regress to having the mind of a child - thereby invalidating this entire premise - the odds are that you aren't going to fancy anyone below the age of 18 at the very bare minimum, and potentially way older depending on when you restarted. That's at least 18 years of being the perviest little tyke around, locked out of your own libido and going flat-out crazy with it. So err yeah… enjoy that. New Life+ is starting to seem a little less appetising.
Kid's toys are all well and good, but what about the video games? Will you still be able to play all of those at an 'adult level', dazzling the other children with your next-level flips and tricks, insider info and first place podiums? Erm no, probably not. The issue here is one of simple coordination. In short, kids just don't have it. And neither will you, at least not for the foreseeable future. Your mind may know exactly which buttons to hit at exactly what time, but just try telling that your mushy, disobliging little body.
The mind may be willing but the flesh is… just sort of stupid, actually, with every single action suddenly becoming akin to clutching at an oiled up electric eel. Hell, even if you could fire up the ol' neural pathways, you’d still have to contend with having two sets of miniature cocktail sausages for hands. Try reaching triangle now, you . Hmm, this is all going rather wrong now, isn't it?
Crafting an effective NG+ mode must be an awfully tricky task. After all, not all players are alike. Some will want to indulge in a glorified victory lap, lopping off the heads of their previously perilous enemies and giggling as they go. Others will crave an even greater challenge, one in which even the level 1 swamp rats fight with the fury of a 7th stage end boss. Many of the entries on this list assume the former scenario, but what if New Life+ conformed instead to the latter? To the type of setup in which every single scrap of knowledge must be utilised in order to survive. One in which the player must endure the extra perils of…
Extreme flatulence, excessive sweating, atrocious acne, abundant body odour, flat feet, squeaky voice, meagre hearing, muddled eyesight, glandular goofs, bloaty head, slack tongue, spare ribs, heaped piles and so forth. The fun wouldn't stop there either. You might, for instance find yourself sentenced to a lifetime in prison, simply for tasting a grape at the supermarket check-out line prior to purchase. People would spit at you, exams last would for aeons, and otherwise harmless critters would make a mad-eyed dash for your larynx on sight. It's a mad, bad, harsh new world, remember?
We were devastated when the show was cancelled back in 1991, so the news that David Lynch and Mark Frost were working on a new season of the surreal murder mystery was one of the delights of 2014. Alas . Whether that will hold remains to be seen – Showtime are keen to tempt him back – but right now we're very, very sad.
Still, it's known that the scripts (all penned by Frost and Lynch) exist and it seems likely that a third run will happen, with or without the Man With The Hair From Another Place. And if it does, there are some questions that we'd like answered... Spoilers for the show and Fire Walk With Me from here on in.
This is our main concern. The TV series ended on the mother of all cliffhangers, with plucky FBI agent Dale Cooper trapped in the Black Lodge and his doppelgänger – actually the demonic Killer BOB – running loose in the real world.
Now, Fire Walk With Me obliquely suggests a way that Cooper might be released (“My name is Annie. I've been with Laura and Dale. The good Dale is in the Lodge, and he can't leave. Write it in your diary.”) and you can bet that Harry would cotton on that something was wrong with his BFF, but it's all very vague. We need to know that our very special agent escaped somehow. And we want to know what BOB's been up to while wearing his face...
Related to that last point, we can assume that Killer BOB will be back in some shape or form. He's the show's primary nemesis – a force of evil who moves from host to host. So while it's sad that we won't see former set dresser Frank Silva again (he passed away in 1995), the character can still appear by wearing the face of one of the people he has possessed. The question is, which one?
Coop is obviously a possibility, though we hope they don't go down that route for too long. It's perhaps more likely that we'll see BOB in the form of Leland Palmer. As the person who murdered Laura, it would make sense. Plus, we know that Ray Wise is likely involved in the new series, and also that he's very good at playing bad.
A bomb went off in “Beyond Life And Death”, apparently killing Andrew Packard, Pete Martell and Audrey Horne. But did any of them make it out alive?
Jack Nance (Pete) and Dan O' Herlihy (Andrew) have both passed away, so that kinda rules out their return. But Audrey presumably survived – she was one of the show's most popular characters, after all. She has to come back.
The same goes for her dad, Ben (played by Richard Beymer). Last time we saw him, his head had been split open by Doc Hayward. It'd be a damn shame if that was the end of Twin Peak's most venal businessman.
But that raises another question. Assuming that Ben did live, which version will we see in season three? The selfish manipulator, or the carrot-munching environmentalist he later became.
Twin Peaks without Laura Palmer is inconceivable – just look at how the show floundered after her killer had been revealed in season two. The character is the key to the entire series: an apparent innocent with some dark secrets. Tellingly, when Lynch returned to this world with Fire Walk With Me, he made sure the film was all about her.
Sheryl Lee has indicated an interest in returning to the role, but the question is how? Not only is Laura dead, but so is her identical cousin Maddy. Now the obvious answer is that we'll probably see her in the Red Room again, which makes sense. Perhaps she's been keeping Coop company all this time. That said, the fact that her spirit will have aged probably needs to be addressed...
This is one of the most hotly debated areas in Peaks lore, and one of the most intriguing loose ends.
In Fire Walk With Me, Laura obtains a ring bearing the mark of the Owl Cave, which has some connection to the Lodge Spirits. The ring passes from Teresa Banks (dead) to Laura (dead) and then to Annie (still alive – just). In The Missing Pieces (the deleted scenes from Fire Walk With Me) we see that it was taken from her by a nurse. So what happened to the ring, and what was its purpose? Who made it? Does it protect its wearer from possession by BOB, or make them more of a target? Hopefully we'll find out more about this next year...
It seems unlikely that we'll see ever rock's greatest chameleon reprise his role as FBI agent Phillip Jeffries. But then again, stranger things have happened – not least the likely return of Twin Peaks
Whatever, his brief scenes in Fire Walk With Me are tantalisingly weird, adding time travel to Peaks' already stacked roster of strange occurrences. It was intended that Jeffries would be a central part of future films or episodes, but the commercial failure of Fire Walk With Me scuppered that. Perhaps now he can be and we'll finally find out more about Judy...
Assuming that both Coop and Audrey are in the show, and not possessed by an evil spirit or, y'know, dead, then will we see them rekindle (or even just kindle) their budding relationship? It was called to a halt in the TV series because Kyle MacLachlan felt it would have been inappropriate for an FBI agent like Coop to start dating a high schooler. A fair point, though Sherilyn Fenn disagreed with the decision back in 1992, saying “I think Kyle blew it, because Dale and Audrey were so great together”.
Well, that wouldn't be a problem any more. Perhaps it's time for the two to give things a shot. That said, things were going pretty well with Annie (Heather Graham) before the last couple of episodes, so maybe he's all settled down with her. Assuming, of course, she survived and that BOB hasn't murdered her in the intervening years.
Twin Peaks is full of strange subplots and odd ideas that were probably never intended for the sort of deep analysis they've received over the last 25 years. Aside from all the big plot stuff, here are a few more of the things we'd like answers to:
How's Annie? Will Donna Hayward be played by Lara Flynn Boyle or Moira Kelly? Did Lucy and Andy ever sort their tangled love-life out, or is Dick Tremayne still being a nuisance? Was Josie ever released from the door knob? Is Chester Desmond still in the Lodge? Is Invitation To Love still on the air? Who, exactly, put the fish in the percolator? Did Little Nicky grow up to be the Antichrist? What has the Pine Weasel been up to for the last two-and-a-half decades?
And when it comes to the bare bones of open-world RPGs, ‘what if’ is their ammunition; the sheer scope for exploration, both of geography and interactive possibility, adds rocket fuel to our weirdest and most wonderfully nerdy desires. But the land of wizards and swords doesn’t own that, , when played like a RPG, is the master of ‘what if’ seduction. What if we were rewarded for our murderous delinquency? What if our sprees of carnage lead to random new adventures and unexpected NPC encounters? What if we could skydive off that mountain after eating a Peyote and transforming into a chicken?
GTA 5 hooks us, and coerces us to push the boundaries of human limitation in a virtual and recognisable world, and far beyond any other entry in the series, it gives us a vast bank of tools (some big, some subtle) with which to interact and manipulate the flow of the world around us. But what if GTA 5’s dynamic, open world complexity was attainable in a gritty and beautiful fantasy setting. Then we’d truly have a world without limits. Dragon flying lessons, fully emergent battles with town guards, real-time, party-based class mechanics that let you storm castles and manage battles with total control. I lead you into the realm of GTA 5 mechanics in a fantasy RPG. Here are eight that’ll make you wish this game into existence.
It’s been done before, and we’ll worship Skyrim until the end of days for gifting such ambitious means of travel. But imagine taking dragon flying to the involved level of GTA 5’s piloting. IMAGINE stealing dragons of different shapes, sizes and abilities. Imagine training them (plural because you can never have too many) to further increase and specialise their skills. Imagine having dragon flying lessons. Imagine falling in love with your dragon.. What? I mean, um…
Without getting too carried away, adapting GTA 5’s various open-world transportation methods into a fantasy setting is excitingly plausible. Along with various mounts, we could have horse and carts instead of trucks, Black Flag-style ships instead of yachts, even giant Mûmakil to roam through treacherous wastelands. Akin to GTA 5, each unique mount and vehicle could have its own handling system, in addition to upgradable stats, and different uses for exploring different terrain. Stealing would be a fun, albeit dangerous ,endeavour, but getting being set on fire during the hijack would totally be worth traversing through the skies on a stolen, military grade dragon, with bright pink wings and tinted wings.
Fantastical advocates of justice who’d relish punishing our potato stealing, our RPG lawkeepers would easily be just as intimidating and furiously dedicated as GTA 5’s police and army punishment system. As each star increases with the severity of our crimes, the force, number and strength of our punishers would rise. At the bottom tier we’d have village and town guards replacing police, and following that, hired mercenaries pursuing us for murder on horseback. At three stars, we’d face off against experienced warriors with better weapons and scarier mounts, leading us into four star territory, where famed knights would hunt us to the edge of the earth.
Finally, for the slaughtering-a-village-and-its-entire-flock-of-chickens tier of crimes, we’d have the ruler’s army knocking on our back door, asking us to kindly repent for our sins with one thousand arrows to the knee. No longer would the RPG town be a safe, but rather static haven. With GTA-style justice enabled, our indiscretions in civilised areas would spill out into the wilderness, covering miles of open ground and leading to all kinds of dynamic adventures and discoveries along the way. Blend Skyrim’s density of hidden areas with that classic ‘Hang on, where am I now?’ moment at the end of a big GTA chase, and you have scarily great possibilities.
Initially, I was dubious of GTA 5’s three character set-up. Could the interwoven stories fit together without undermining our connection with the playable characters? In actuality, Rockstar ensures the opposite. The entwined stories here are effortless, with real-time actions and consequences we invest in, due to our deep integration with the multiple storylines, the likability of each character, and the unique relationships we are encouraged to explore. Not to mention the building narrative tensions we get to perceive, unbeknownst to the protagonists, thanks to our uniquely omnipotent perspective. It’s an amazingly rich storytelling device.
I also love the way Trevor, Michael, and Franklin are utterly their own, from their taste in shoes to their individual mid and early-life crises. With fantasy, we can take this multiple character system further, using all kinds of old and new races to explore, in as much depth of GTA 5, the different cultures, behaviours, and moral compasses of each unique, playable character. Imagine the friendships we could forge; elf, man, dwarf. Well, it’s difficult to compete with the likes of Legolas and Gimli’s bromance, but damnit, if any game can pull that off, it’s a GTA-style RPG.
GTA 5’s three character infiltration missions are what I live for; the thrill of meticulously preparing and orchestrating heists from various angles and strategies gives me all kinds of scary-good palpitations. So, what would happen if we put these types of missions into a fantasy RPG? Magical things, that’s what. You know how Lord of the Rings’ stand-out moments giddily amplify the action through their constant switching of different perspectives? Helm’s Deep, anyone? Now imagine that in a fantasy RPG, in which every key player is you.
Embracing each character’s individual strengths, we would utilise different skills during assassinations, robberies, getaways, and large battles, at different times, and often in different locations. Whether it’s scouting from afar with a bow, commanding armies with brute force on the frontline, or executing Assassin’s Creed style infiltrations on castles, dungeons and scalable fortresses, the gameplay and narrative scope would explode in unforgettable ways. And we mustn’t forget the dragon factor. Never forget the dragons. Because why bother using explosives when we have balls of fire?
Down-time in GTA 5 is ample, and with so many hobbies to choose from, in-game procrastination can get pretty addictive… even if you just stick to the bars, for excessive cocktail consumption, awkward drunken banter, and dangerous driving. If you’re the type of person who daydreams about frolicking at cute village festivals and partaking in the odd dragon flying lesson (yeah, I really am into that idea), then having such activities readily available in a fantasy world, whether Witcher dark or Final Fantasy pretty, would be the ultimate nerd-dream.
This fantasy open-world, replicating Los Santos’ jocular environment, would be our very own magical playground. Stunts and races involving mounts would supply hours of fun, in addition to agility tests like GTA’s triathlons, board games, archery competitions, and watching medieval plays instead of movies. The village inn would no longer be a sterile environment of looping conversations and unchanging clientele. You could even take Trevor the elf to village dances! Throw in enough mead, and the aforementioned law enforcement, and that’s going to make quite the weekend escapade.
I remember looking at my GTA 5 Achievements and spotting ‘You have spent over £30,000 on clothes'. £30,000 ON CLOTHES. Good god, I'm such a fashion whore. But having the right shoes for murder is imperative, right? Imagine if a fantasy world had as many shopping choices as GTA 5; from cloaks, to boots, to badass weapon belts. Imagine if the look of your character wasn’t simply defined by your current best armour set-up, but fuelled by just as many, if not more, options designed for pure aesthetic fun? Character attachment would skyrocket, and real-world shopping would never be the same again.
Though obviously we’re not going to be all spending our cash on new threads, since GTA 5 also incorporates property investment, from cinemas to golf clubs, in addition to purchasing expensive merchandise from in-universe online stores. Translate this into fantasy speak, and we’re talking about buying pubs, bakeries, apothecaries, and forges (no doubt taking discount supplies from their various storerooms), and then moving on to bigger, more financially rewarding stuff, such as mines and wilderness forts. Investing in stocks might be tricky without an in-universe internet (just imagine Gerald asking for the WiFi password), but players could visit banks for this purpose instead, and enjoy the many insane luxuries a fantasy world has to offer.
In GTA 5, phones play a crucial role in missions, as our most reliable source of communication and information in tricky, escalating situation. Impossible to realise that dynamic, organic vibe in a world in which rocks are the height of technology? No. I have a viable fantasy alternative to cell phones, and I’m not talking about cans and string. Magic is our best friend here, since really, there are no limits to possibility when it comes to doing the impossible.
Portable magic mirrors would allow us to talk and send messages to other characters in-game. Small portals and telepathy would do the job as well. We could use seer abilities during assassination and search quests, and occult abilities aside, important mail could be dispatched by eagles, for surprise story pay-offs later down the line. And we mustn’t forget an alternative to GTA 5’s phone camera, which is one of my most consistent sources of fun. Using a sketch book and some magically accelerated drawing abilities, you could capture those all those magical moments - from discovering magnificent waterfalls to pillaging the poor - and adorn the walls of your customisable castle crib with permanent records of your adventures.
One of the most absorbing aspects of GTA 5 is its environment; a world with a perfect balance of scale and detail. Every region is teeming with life and vibrancy, packing with fully fleshed areas that you won’t even see if you just stick to the main story., making the city, natural landscapes, and ocean feel impressively organic. Take that, along with the abolishment of loading screens, and it’s extremely easy to get lost in the stunning, thriving, damaged world of Los Santos.
It would almost be dangerous to experience a similar environment in a fantasy setting, owing to the genre’s flexibility when it comes to imagination. We could scale active volcanoes. We could search for rare beasts in all-enveloping forests. We could explore uncharted oceans brimming with aquatic nightmares. It would be an unkickable open-world drug addiction. We could also build upon what GTA 5’s world lacks, such as a Witcher 3-style weather system with the ability to change the landscape, animals we can tame, and a vastly more varied array of structures to interact with. Yay for tree climbing!
It's amazing what players can do when you give them a way to channel their creativity. Following in the footsteps of Valve's Source Filmmaker, Rockstar Games added the power to make in-game movies to the PC version of lets you record whatever kind of chaos or goofy mundanity you want in the city of Los Santos, then trick out the footage with all manner of camera angles, filters, and editing tricks. And already, the results are magical.
We've sifted past hours of pointless test clips and virtual animal abuse videos to find the very best works made in the Rockstar Editor, and we've shared their greatness with you. Pop some popcorn, crank up the home theater system you made for the express purpose of watching YouTube videos, and please enjoy these shockingly funny and entertaining short films. They could very well change the way you see Grand Theft Auto forever (particularly the mimes).
While not quite as polished as some of the later edits in this collection, this is the first piece of work that really convinced us of the creative potential in GTA 5's PC video editor. A million smart little things just add up to make it fantastic. The intimate, unspoken tension, built up through close shots at the start. Those brilliant transition edits, where the camera lingers in just the right way before a cut, or zooms and pans to make wonderful, often hilarious changes in subject. That choice of soundtrack. It's great. It's great and we love it.
Mimes are creepy in demeanour, upsetting to look at, and just flat abhorrent in every single meaningful way. You know that. Trevor Phillips certainly knows that. Strike first. That's how you stay safe around mimes. But what if you try to take the passive approach? What if you just ignore them and hope that they'll go away?
Well then you are a goddamn fool. Duggy Duggy knows the score.
There are a lot of action edits around for GTA 5 on PC. There are a lot of comedy slapstick edits too. But JUMP, by the poetically named bitches, is by far the classiest piece of pure mood editing we've ever seen. Go full screen, turn the sound up, and get it watched.
Speaking of slapstick, this. Short, desperately to the point, and with a hell of a punchline. This is damn smart, conceptual use of game, editor and environment. You don't need to be Michael Bay to impress in GTA 5. Hell, you just don't need to be Michael Bay. Ever.
‘Scuse the abrupt ending on this one. As the official title suggests, it was made as an initial test of the editor's capabilities. Fortunately, it was made as a test by someone who seriously knows cinematography. By focusing on depth of field effects and just the right amount of free-aimed shaky-cam, Womble turns a very simple action scene into something with raw power and serious kinetic impact.
There's probably a painful, yearning metaphor in here about the impotent, directionless striving of modern humanity's mindless, empty ambition and the mechanical, isolated nature of our daily lives. Probably.
So, so dark, but so, so well directed.
But yeah, really dark. And stabby.
This is a bit of a special one, in that creator Danz Newz has gone the whole hog and created a proper script and professional sounding voiceover to create a bona fide short film. It's so well put together that, unlike most of the rest of the pieces in this list, after a minute or so you'll entirely forget that you're watching something created in a game, and instead see it simply as a great animated short.
A generic title belying two minutes of killer content. On the Michael Bay end of things - but, you know, Michael Bay if he was good - rechyyy's piece is a masterclass in smart camerawork and effective pacing. Watch it. Watch it now.
Made by PC Gamer's Andy Kelly this very afternoon, PUMP is a masterpiece, a twisting piece of existential reflection wrapping in and around itself to present a stark and primal view of the modern human experience. The question of whether games can be art has finally been left behind, choking in the primordial ooze as work like this launches us all into a gleaming, truly evolved future.
We'll keep updating this collection as we discover - and players make - even more amazing GTA 5 videos. Have these inspired you to join the moment-capturing fun? Do you know of any other unforgettable Rockstar Editor flicks? Let us know in the comments below!
And if you're looking for more GTA hilarity, check out .
